ByElle McFarlane, writer at Creators.co
'There's always someone younger and hungrier coming down the stairs after you.'
Elle McFarlane

The pressure of Hollywood drives many to drugs, some to obscure religious beliefs and most to insanity, but it is often the demand to look good which pushes celebrities over the edge.

Just when you think you've heard it all, Michelle Pfeiffer reveals she used to subside off the breatharian diet which literally replaces eating with breathing or Demi Moore ingests food like a werewolf, following the cycle of the moon. In an attempt to unveil the true lunacy of the celebrity fad diet, we've compiled a list of the most moronic, most deranged and most disturbing of them all, but remember, do not, under any circumstances, try these at home.


1. January Jones

Diet: The dried, crushed and encapsulated remnants of her sons placenta.

In a bid to lose the baby weight following the birth of her son, January was apparently inspired by an ancient Chinese tradition and now regularly ingests the remains of her own placenta.

Crazy Factor: 9/10

2. Rene Zellweger

Diet: Replacing food with ice cubes

Known for yo-yo dieting to get both in and out of shape for Bridget Jones, when it comes to returning to her 'Hollywood size,' in combination with a lot of running, Rene likes to simulate the process of eating but without actually eating, instead replacing food with delicious, nutritious ice cubes.

Crazy Factor: 8/10

I'd rather be Bridgette Jones, thanks
I'd rather be Bridgette Jones, thanks

3. The Rock

Diet: Consuming over five thousand calories across seven meals a day

In order to maintain his intimidatingly buff appearance, Dwayne has to spend most of his day consuming a colossal quantity of calories. Think each time you've ordered everything on the local take away menu in a hungover stupor, and times it by seven.

Crazy Factor: 7/10

4. Madonna

Diet: Predominantly sea vegetables

Ascribing to a particular form of the 'macrobiotic diet' which focuses on consuming different families of vegetables whilst balancing out the ying and the yang of food and cookware, Madonna eats a diet mostly comprised of sea vegetables and if branching out to include wholegrain rice, has to make sure to chew it extensively before swallowing.

Crazy Factor: 7/10

However, we do have evidence of her eating something definitely not resembling a vegetable:

5. Harry Styles

Diet: Calorific coffee

Choosing to consume 'Bullet Coffee' which is essentially a cup of coffee with a tablespoon of butter and tablespoon of coconut whisked into it, Harry Styles forgoes the effort of actually having to consume food like a regular mortal.

Crazy Factor: 5/10

6. Sarah Michelle Gellar

Diet: Nothing but cabbage soup

Sarah's cabbage soup diet is exactly as you would imagine it. Instead of opting for a balanced diet you instead swap all your normal food stuffs with, you've guessed it, cabbage soup and in doing so, actively choose to eat as the poor workhouse bound orphan Oliver Twist did.

Crazy Factor: 7/10

Buffy the Vampire Slayer knows where it's at
Buffy the Vampire Slayer knows where it's at

7. Jennifer Lopez

Diet: A vial of grapefruit oil

J-Lo wards those evil demons of hunger away by wearing a vile of grapefruit oil which, upon feeling the first pang of hunger, she immediately smells, miraculously preventing her from feeling hungry any longer! If that wasn't enough, this little vial of fruity wonder is also supposed to help to break down fat. I guess everyone from the block has one these nowadays.

Crazy Factor: 8/10

8. Laura Prepon

Diet: Injecting herself with the urine of pregnant women

No, this isn't the storyline of some sinister horror film, this is Laura Prepon's life. Not satisfied with the usual carb-cutting approach, Laura decided instead to inject herself with a hormone which is extracted from the liquid excretions of pregnant women. Otherwise known as the HCG diet plan, this particular method has yet to yield any real results, surprisingly.

Crazy Factor: 10/10

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9. Nicholas Cage

Diet: Selecting which animals to eat based on their mating habits

Although there is no scientific proof that the way animals get their kicks affects the way they taste, Nicholas Cage has decided to do away with science or rational thinking altogether. Stating that he eats fish and poultry because of the dignified way they have sex, we can only imagine the trail of obscure web searches he must have left whilst choosing what to order in the restaurant.

Crazy Factor: 9/10

Although, we know fruits are definitely on the menu:

10. Beyonce

Diet: Consuming only lemonade (the drink, not her album)

It's no coincidence that Beyonce named her latest album Lemonade given that she is a disciple of Stanley Burroughs's 'master cleanser' diet, also known as the lemonade diet. Subsisting as you might expect on absolutely no solid foods, Beyonce would consume a variety of different liquids, most of the made up from the likes of lemon juice, maple syrup, water and the vintage tears of Michelle Williams.

Crazy Factor: 6/10

11. Jake Gyllenhaal

Diet: Gum and kale salad

In preparation for his role as the intense and borderline insane paparazzo, Lou Bloom, in Nightcrawler, Jake spent most of his time running and surviving off a diet of kale salad interspersed with nutritional bouts of frantic gum chewing. Tasty.

Crazy Factor: 7/10

Nightcrawler
Nightcrawler

12. Lady Gaga

Diet: Replacing food with alcohol

Whilst this may sound like the diet of most freshmen, this so called diet was actually founded by Gaga's former on again, off again boyfriend Lüc Carl who wrote a book 'The Drunken Diet' from which the synopsis reads:

“After reading countless books and being told time after time that it’s impossible to lose weight while drinking alcohol heavily, Lüc Carl decided to take matters into his own hands. Join him on his journey to lose 40 pounds, without giving up his principles of being a hard drinking party maker.”

It's safe to say, it's probably for the best that they are no longer together.

Crazy Factor: 8/10

13. Snookie

Diet: Six cookies a day

Managing to find a perfect balance between those supposed opposite words 'diet' and 'cookies,' the Jersey Shore star decided to convert to Dr. Siegal's cookie diet. This meant eating only six cookies a day which contained beef and milk protein in a bid to suppress the appetite. Without J-lo's grapefruit vile though, we don't think this would be enough to truly keep those hunger pains at bay.

Crazy Factor: 6/10

Judging by this video, she should probably avoid Beyonce's lemonade diet:

14. Reese Witherspoon

Diet: Baby food

Instead of devouring breakfast and lunch in the traditional manner, Reese opts to supplement her meals with a liquified version, eating essentially what is commonly referred to as baby food. Apart from the nostalgic factor, we can't help but feel we'd miss actually chewing our food before swallowing it.

Crazy Factor: 5/10

Legally Blonde
Legally Blonde

15. Christina Aguilera

Diet: Eating according to the color of the day

Following the 7-day color diet which means you can only eat food of one type of color each day, Christina converted to this vibrant approach to nutrition. Starting with white foods she then went on to eat red, green, orange, purple, yellow and then a multi-colored array of foods on the seventh day to encompass the full culinary rainbow.

Crazy Factor: 6/10

16. Miranda Kerr

Diet: Slurping down a delicious spoonful of coconut oil

While many celebrity diets revolve around avoiding any kind of fat like it is toxic nuclear waste, Miranda Kerr chooses to gulp down a spoon (size not specified — hopefully not a ladle) of coconut oil everyday to prevent bloating. Apparently some top nutritionalists agree this is a good idea, but we all know the kind of madness they're into...

Crazy Factor: 4/10

A sweet blast of coconut breath from Miranda
A sweet blast of coconut breath from Miranda

18. Elizabeth Hurley

Diet: Watercress Water

Elizabeth Hurley's figure has never deviated from it's svelte ideal during her entire career, but what sacrifices does the 47-year-old have to make for this pleasure? The star once told The Daily Mail that she glugs at least six cups of watercress soup (a.k.a. green water) a day when she is battling the bloat. Her poor, poor toilet.

Crazy Factor: 7/10

You don't want to know the price to look this good...
You don't want to know the price to look this good...

19. Mariah Carey

Diet: Blandness

Boring yourself out of wanting to eat is a tactic I've never thought of before, but apparently it is the secret behind Mariah Carey's figure. Although the divas rider might be about 40 pages long and riddled with demands, her chef has it easy preparing fish and vegetables with no additional salt, pepper or other seasoning. Yum!

Crazy Factor: 5/10

Would cool beans salad be permitted in Mariah's diet?
Would cool beans salad be permitted in Mariah's diet?

20. Elle Macpherson

Diet: The Alkaline Diet

Thought tomatoes were good for you? WRONG! According to Elle 'The Body' Macpherson, any food with a high pH balance is the devil itself and delicious alkaline food like roots, nuts, and legumes are the way to go. Presumably wasp stings are also okay, but avoid those pesky bees like the plague.

Crazy Factor: 8/10

Is anyone surprised these guys are friends?
Is anyone surprised these guys are friends?

21. Kate Upton

Diet: Blood type diet

Some mere peasants think that their blood type only matters when they need a transfusion or to donate the red stuff, but enlightened types like Kate Upton have other ideas. According to the models personal trainer Justin Gelband:

"Our blood type has a lot to do with the way your body digests, processes, and metabolizes food. The method is 90 percent accurate.”

Hmmmm.

Crazy Factor: 8/10

22. Eva Mendes

Diet: Only eating five things

Imagine choking down five meals a day that all contain the same five ingredients. That's what you have to do to look like Eva Medes. Nope.

Crazy Factor: 6/10

And that's what you have do to go out with Ryan Gosling...
And that's what you have do to go out with Ryan Gosling...

23. Demi Moore

Diet: Eating to the cycles of the moon

Back in ye olde times, the moon was a sacred pagan symbol used to give all sorts of meaning to life events. Science should probably have put a stop to all this superstition, but Demi Moore didn't get the memo. Supposedly, the gravitational pull of the moon tells you when to cleanse and also has the power to make you less starving hungry. Who knew!

Crazy Factor: 10/10

Only the moon can tell Demi what to do!
Only the moon can tell Demi what to do!

Under What Circumstances Would You Be Prepared To Give One Of These Crazy Diets A Try?

(Source: The Daily Star, Shape, The Cut)