It's been a week now since Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows, the sequel to the 2014 CGI-packed take on the pizza-loving ninjas, has been released, and despite critical backlash, the first fan reviews are already looking pretty good.
To celebrate, three of the Turtles came over to Movie Pilot to share some behind-the-scenes details and indulge in a little nostalgia for the franchise, which started with a comic book in 1984. But there's one of the movie's stars who was clearly missing: Megan Fox, who plays journalist and skimpy skirt specialist April.
The former Transformers actress has always had a knack for interviews, making statements ranging from the insightful to the puzzling to the downright weird. While she's celebrating her second Turtles movie and until we can congratulate her on her third child, let's look back at some of Megan Fox's best quotes — each of them proof that she's just a fantastic human being.
1. Megan Fox Describes Herself As A 'Forest Nymph' On Her Instagram
Let's start with her Instagram account, where her profile description reads:
Child of the Cherokee Tribe forest nymph Lunar Leo mother goddess to 2 bohemian revolutionaries
If you're a newcomer to the Foxy way of life, it's the perfect introduction to her belief in astrology and the supernatural — as she puts it herself in the post below, "you know, I'm like, magic and all that."
2. Megan Fox Can Sense The Spirit Of Chelsea Handler's Unborn Fetus
Although she insists she's not a psychic, Megan Fox showed off her clairvoyance skills by analyzing the presence she felt in Chelsea Handler's dog.
"What I got was that there's a soul that's around you, around your dog, that was a child that was conceived at some point — that's yours, that's over there with your mother. And they do sort of watch over you through the dog."
That's just fascinating and terrifying at the same time.
3. Megan Fox Would Strangle An Animal For Olivia Wilde
A while ago, she told GQ that she had a severe crush on fellow actress Olivia Wilde (haven't we all?). But in case you weren't sure how severe exactly she meant, she specified what she would actually go through to get near Wilde:
"Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox."
It's as specific as it sounds exciting. It's like she would even go through the trouble of finding a mountain ox first just to be able to strangle it.
4. Sometimes, Megan Fox 'Just Knows Things'
Recently, Megan Fox dived deeper into how she's always gotten mysterious intuitions about herself and other people around her.
"Sometimes I just know things. I accidentally tap into stuff sometimes. I used to do it as a kid, and I do it as an adult."
As she told the LA Times, she's got projects far beyond her acting career.
“I don’t think acting is my ultimate passion. I have other skill sets and gifts that are much, much stronger that I am obligated to exercise and use. I’m really more intellectually minded. I’ve always been into alternative history, antiquities, archaeology. I’ve always been really consumed by these deep mysteries that exist on our planet that can’t be explained today by science. They eat away at me.”
Following in the footsteps of her Turtles character April, could she see herself as a journalist? Hell yeah!
"If I ended up working for Vice, that would be a dream. I don't know how that could ever work, but I do have a little bit of a journalistic streak and I'm also reckless enough to do well in that field, I think."
But most importantly, she addressed how she tends to come across as "just a pretty face" — because let's face it, she's pretty. Still, she's absolutely right to point there's no reason why she should make less effort on her appearance.
"I think people, in general, are plebeians that are brainwashed by the type of media that they expose themselves to. People anticipate a shallowness [from me]. They anticipate a self-centeredness and a lack of self-awareness. It doesn't matter what I say, or how eloquent a speaker I may be, or how positive my intentions may be. I'm going to be made into what people desire me to be. At this moment, they might desire to exalt me onto a pedestal. But the next? You're a human sacrifice. The control is not in my hands."
Tl;dr? Don't judge a book by its cover!
5. Megan Fox Has Specific Cravings
The magazine Interview reminded us of a gem that's right up there on the crush podium with that mountain ox:
"I want to eat Robert Pattinson."
6. Her Unborn Baby Tells Megan Fox A Lot Of Things
Last week on Jimmy Kimmel, she stayed with her latest trend of picking up the unborn baby vibes in the room. This time, it's her very own third child who led her to moving houses.
"This baby wanted me to live somewhere else, so we’re moving to a whole different place in Los Angeles because I feel like that’s where this baby wants to be raised."
A mom just knows what's best for her child, doesn't she? She's also got a feeling that this baby is going to be special.
"I also feel like this baby is telling me it's kind of like a Wernher von Braun or an Elon Musk, like a super genius."
I honestly can't wait for Megan Fox to go on a journalistic adventure with her super genius of a child.
7. Megan Fox Makes A Great Point About Privacy In Hollywood
Speaking to comedic genius Zach Galifianakis for Interview, Megan Fox explained how absurd the whole celebrity deal could sometimes be. And it's not surprising when you hear her accounts of having to hide behind sunglasses even when she's just crossing the street, or being photographed everywhere she goes.
"I'm one of those people who fiercely guards their privacy, so I hate doing interviews. Because just in terms of the experience I've had with the media so far, almost everything I say, no matter how innocent my intentions are, seems to get sort of manipulated and sensationalized and turned into some ridiculous news story."
We need more celebs who don't care so much about what's said on Page Six!
8. On Top Of Spiritualism, Megan Fox Is Great At Handwriting
She's full of surprises: Megan Fox once revealed an unexpected skill to The Huffington Post.
"Do I know how to write letters with a pen and paper? I do. I actually took calligraphy class in high school and have kind of incredible handwriting."
Why she doesn't regularly post meditational quotes written in her gorgeous handwriting on her Instagram is beyond me.
9. Megan Fox's Motherly Instinct Go Beyond Her Own Children
Apparently Will Arnett, Megan Fox's co-star on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, is quite the lover. And she wasn't going to let him get away with bringing a different girlfriend on set every week.
"They were progressively getting younger and younger as the weeks went on, and it got to the point where I was like, 'Buddy, I'm worried. Should I talk to craft service and make sure they have Lunchables for your girlfriend?'"
I wonder if Arnett's recovered from that burn yet?
10. Megan Fox Has The Ultimate Life Advice For You
The best of Megan Fox's quotes, however, is when she gave actual life advice to the readers of Men's Health, to us, to you.
First she tore apart that old cliché that men have to be tough, as if they just weren't allowed to feel any feelings.
"In my opinion, you can't be too open or too gentle or kind or sensitive. If you really want to work on a relationship and have one that lasts, you have to be willing to go deep into human psychology and emotion."
Take note, gentlemen.
Speaking of Dr. Michael Newton's book Journey of Souls, in which he investigates on "lives between lives," she also implied it's OK to make mistakes.
"Life on earth is like college and we’re all just trying to pass the courses."
As for what you should do starting tomorrow?
"Go watch Point Break again on DVD. It's the ultimate classic and you've gotta love that. Eat a tremendous amount of protein and fiber, and cut out all of your carbs if you can. And be nice to other people. I think that's a good start."
A great start indeed. Keep on being you, Megan Fox!