Posted by David Opie @DavidOpie
The day someone green-lights a Marvel Zombies Ghibli film directed by Xavier Dolan is the day I will be happy. Any day now...
David Opie

We're only halfway through 2016, but Chris Evans has already had a better year than 99% of the population. The actor's starring role in Captain America: Civil War helped catapult the movie past a billion dollars at the box office, breaking records everywhere while receiving heaps of critical acclaim too.

Chris Evans turns 35 today, so what better way is there to celebrate the Star Spangled Avenger's birthday then take a look back through his best movies, analysing the socio-economic implications of his performances through — Oh, who are we kidding? You all read the title already. We know exactly why you're here.

More like thirsty.
More like thirsty.

Without further ado, sit back and enjoy 12 of Chris Evans's hottest movie roles.

1. Not Another Teen Movie (2001)

Whipped cream has never looked so good.

2. Cellular (2004)

Maybe this film would have performed better if shirtless Chris Evans had been used on the poster.

3. Fantastic Four (2005)

Via Fox
Via Fox

Chris Evans has literally never been hotter.

4. Fantastic Four 2 (2007)

Via Fox
Via Fox

Wait, we take that back.

5. Push (2009)

Via Icon Productions
Via Icon Productions

Turns out that Evans looks pretty great with clothes on too.

6. The Losers (2010)

Via Warner Bros.
Via Warner Bros.

Not even ugly glasses and questionable facial hair can detract from his hotness.

7. Puncture (2011)

Via Millennium Entertainment
Via Millennium Entertainment

Is that a zipper tattoo trailing down his spine? Hot nonetheless.

8. What's Your Number (2011)

Via Fox
Via Fox

Fed up of looking at hot Chris Evans pics?

Via Fox
Via Fox

Good, because we have plenty more where those came from.

Vix Fox
Vix Fox

The comedy What's Your Number truly was a gift to us all back in 2011.

9. Captain America: First Avenger (2011)

Via Marvel
Via Marvel

Peggy Carter is every single one of us in this scene.

Via Marvel
Via Marvel

Is this the actual movie or an impressive porn parody?

10. Captain America: Winter Soldier (2014)

It really doesn't matter if you like superhero movies or not by this point.

11. Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)

Via Marvel
Via Marvel

Arms for days.

12. Captain America: Civil War (2016)

Via Marvel
Via Marvel

Those are real arms. No, really. We kid you not. Here's the workout Evans does if you don't believe us.

BONUS: Gucci Campaign

Via Gucci
Via Gucci

We're not even going to pretend it's about movies anymore.

The next time we'll see Chris Evans on screen is in his upcoming drama Gifted, followed by Avengers: Infinity War and maybe even a cameo in Spider-Man: Homecoming. *Instantly books front-row tickets*

What is Chris Evans's hottest moment?

Via Fox
Via Fox

We'll let you caption this pic.