Hollywood loves Dwayne Johnson. They love to cast him in movies, and they love paying him a ton of cash for the privilege. He's worth it, too; The Rock's last five films were major box office successes, proving that many people are big fans of his work. Hell, even the ever-cynical Neil deGrasse Tyson loves him some Dwayne Johnson.
By that logic, #TheRock has the ability to turn any film into a hit, right? Wrong. In fact, even Johnson himself can recognize a terrible script when he sees it, as demonstrated in a recent hilarious video.
GQ's video shows Johnson going through the usual Hollywood rigmarole, shuffling through scripts in search of his next part. The suggestions from his agent (played by actor Tituss Burgess) gradually become more and more ludicrous, from a Napoleon Dynamite sequel to a remake (yes, already) of The Revenant that involves Johnson getting intimate with the bear.
Check out the hilarity below:
These Strange Movies Still Wouldn't Be His Worst
Granted, Johnson should most definitely steer well-clear of any movie that depicts erotic situations with woodland creatures, or requires him to beat children. Though there's no denying that his role as Tommy DeVito's long-lost comedian son in Goodfellas 2 would be absolute gold— Johnson's obviously a big Joe Pesci fan. Unfortunately, he wasn't too keen on all that "cussing".
But given a few of his previous films, some of the suggested sequels from the video pale in comparison to Johnson's more questionable roles. Remember these movies?
'Tooth Fairy' (2010)
Johnson plays a smug, macho hockey player transformed into a silk pajama-clad fairy, complete with a fluffy set of wings. This not-so-subtle message behind this family-friendly comedy is basically "emasculation is humiliating and therefore funny", so it's hardly surprising that it wasn't a hit with the critics. On the other hand, it was a total box office success.
Of all the video game movie adaptations that should never have been made, Doom is pretty high up on the list. Even The Rock couldn't save this terrible sci-fi from certain box office failure, and the video game movie genre really hasn't improved much since.
'The Mummy Returns' (2001)
Considering this was only Johnson's second film, it's a little much to hold this comedic Brendan Fraser extravaganza against him. No amount of good acting could have saved this movie from the horrendous CGI that transformed The Rock from buff wrestler to badly animated video game character. Then again, it was 2001. Luckily, Johnson was able to ditch the CGI for a live-action performance in The Scorpion King a year later.
Do you think Dwayne Johnson could make any movie a hit, or does The Rock's magic only extend so far?