ByS.C. O'Donnell, writer at
"Zombies, exploding heads...creepy-crawlies and a date for the formal - This is classic, Spanky." Follow me on Twitter: @Scodonnell1
S.C. O'Donnell

Mark Wahlberg is the gift that keeps on giving. If he's not encouraging us to feel the vibrations, he's telling us to grab our genitals and remind ourselves that we are great big shining stars. He's starred in many films, including Boogie Nights, The Fighter, and Lone Survivor. Before his illustrious acting career he was a rapper, going by the name Marky Mark, accompanied, always, by The Funky Bunch.

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Image: Wikimedia Commons
Image: Wikimedia Commons

has grown to become one of the most influential figures in Hollywood, not just as an actor, but with producing as well. He modeled HBO series Entourage after his life — it was pretty much Sex in the City for dudes — and produced the show, while also receiving a creator credit. He has run the gamut in his acting career, with films that garnered Oscar buzz, while others had giant robots riding giant robot dinosaurs.

Watch the trailer for Mark Wahlberg's latest film Patriots Day:

Wahlberg was also a model, who was widely regarded for his physique. He has always been a fitness guru, and managed to stay in pretty excellent shape. In 1993 when he was only 22 years old, he decided to share his fitness knowledge with the world. The result of this is one of the oddest things ever marketed to the American people.

Funky Fitness

Image: Paramount Pictures
Image: Paramount Pictures

His workout tape, Form... Focus... Fitness, may be his greatest contribution to mankind. The entire video — which was released exclusively on VHS — has a run time of over an hour. However, below we have found a condensed version that highlights Marky Mark at his finest.

Check out a clip Wahlberg's workout tape below:

As you can plainly see in this video, it is less of a workout tape, and more of a young Mark Wahlberg systematically trying to get into the world's collective panties. Which is not a bad thing, thing — his young co-star certainly seems to enjoy his company —but it's the first time we've ever seen of one person hitting on another in a workout video. It plays much like pornography, only they substituted sex for working out.

This is also one of the most quintessentially '90s videos ever made. The use of the term "fly hunnies" stands out, because it is both ridiculous and archaic. Wahlberg is definitely in character for the duration of the video, as we have seen over the years that he doesn't speak that way in real life. He seems entrenched in his rap persona, while being the living definition of a lady killer. It is of note that his brother — former New Kids on the Block alumni Donnie Wahlberg — composed all the music for the video.

Image: Interscope/Atlantic
Image: Interscope/Atlantic

Wahlberg has definitely made an effort to move on from his past exploits, the video tape being one of those things. During an interview with Men's Health Magazine, Mark was questioned about his workout tape. He was first asked if he remembered the video, and what his thoughts were on it:

He then did a bit of back-pedalling, speaking on the principles of the videos, looking past the aesthetics and silly nature of the video:

Sure, yeah. With the workout video, the clothes might be a little embarrassing in hindsight, but I wasn't pretending to be something I wasn't. And fitness was and is important to me. I’ve always been into working out and eating healthy. That's just who I am.

When all is said and done, Mark Wahlberg always seems to come out on top. If there was any consequence to this video, it's that he is and always will be loved by his fans. He continues to work, putting out great movies as of late. You can watch the full version of the video here: Form... Focus... Fitness, and make sure check out Mark Wahlberg in Patriots Day in theaters December 21, 2016.

Sound Off! Are you excited to do the Mark Wahlberg workout? Let it be known in the comments section below!

[Source: Men's Health Magazine. Image: Eva Renaldi.]

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