That's it. I've made my decision. If I could pluck any ripe young girlfriend from the bountiful celeb tree, I would choose you Rihanna.
You just know her pillowy, ganja flavoured lips would be like the touch of two delicate unicorn feathers on your face. And her booty is bangin'
Me and bad gal RiRi would have such a blast together, we could share clothes and she could teach me how to make rubbing my buttocks on a wall look hot. Basically, it would be like that Rihanna and Shakira video, but with more booze and blunts.
Hear my plea raunchy RiRi!
(Source: Drunken Stepfather)