ByWill Wharton, writer at
Creative Director
Will Wharton

Personally I believe that Rihanna is an alien sent from a distant galaxy to study our primitive reactions to what her intergalactic overlords believe to be the perfect human female specimen. After flooding our twitter feeds with endless photos of her perfectly formed extraterrestrial body, said overlords will gather the data accrued from us fans panting like ravenous dogs over what appears to be an incredible depiction of womanhood and use said data as an entry point into the beginnings of a brutal invasion that will take place over many years and eventually culminating in the annihilation of the human race. Yeah. So kind of a big deal.

Which means we AB-SO-LUTE-LY must not look at this picture of Rihanna and enjoy it. We must not comment, like, share or interact in any way with Rihanna or her image so the alien overlords can gather no data to use on us.

It's just....

...she's so... lovely to look at...

We're screwed.


Latest from our Creators