ByRicky Derisz, writer at
Staff Writer at MP. "Holy cow, Rick! I didn't know hanging out with you was making me smarter!" Twitter: @RDerisz.
Ricky Derisz

A magical realm lies beyond, rich in opportunity, shrouded in mystery, and also brimming with danger. A fantastical world where nothing can be predicted, monsters do exist, and a band of unlikely heroes must team together to save the day. While it could be the world of a blockbuster movie, it is also the premise of the popular RPG, Dungeons and Dragons.

Considering the role-playing game's popularity over the past three decades, it's surprising an adaptation hasn't been made for the big screen. Yet it would take something special to do a service to those who have spent many hours participating, creating spontaneous characters and storylines. Something so special, it'd be hard for any Hollywood executive to say no.

Well, that something special may've just been created. The story-rich RPG was the inspiration for an epic pitch, posted on Reddit by AmnesiaCane, which has laid the foundation for what could become a must see movie: Vin Diesel and Terry Crews starring in a fantasy film based on them playing the game as themselves, split between them acting out battles in full blockbuster glory.

See also:

Vin Diesel? Terry Crews? Dungeons and Dragons? What's Not To Like?

Fronting the pitch with these two unlikely actors isn't completely random; Vin Diesel is a vocal lover of the game. Terry Crews, too, has spoken of his admiration for some RPG action, and there have even been rumors the duo have occasionally played together.

Such is Diesel's passion for the game, his character Kaulder in The Last Witch Hunter (2015) was based on a creation thought of while playing a Dungeons and Dragons session. He also starred in an extended recorded session which was released online, the highlights of which are below:

For those unfamiliar, each player becomes a character in an unfolding narrative, helmed by the Dungeon Master and narrator of the story. At various points, those involved have to decide on an action, and roll a dice to randomly decide the success of the outcome.

Hollywood's Finest Join RPG-Forces

So, back to the pitch, which would surely turn heads in Hollywood. The premise of the movie would be based around Diesel and Crews playing the game, intertwined with a full exploration into the fantasy world. Think grandiose costumes, CGI demons and elaborate storylines, contrasted with some of the biggest names in the film industry, sat around a table, nerding out.

RDJ, The Rock, Matt Damon and Paton Oswalt
RDJ, The Rock, Matt Damon and Paton Oswalt

In addition to Diesel and Crews, AmnesiaCane has fancast the following star-studded line-up:

  • Robert Downey Jr.: The Iron Man actor, and one of the highest paid actors in the world, could add his dulcet tones to the narration, as well as taking on the role of various villains the team encounter (RDJ as a CGI ogre, anyone?).
  • The Rock: Dwayne Johnson, the prolific and abundantly likeable former Wrestler and mass of muscle could play "The New Guy," who ironically would be a feeble character with little strength. Cue Johnson struggling to do simple physical tasks.
  • Matt Damon: The Oscar winner would add to his repertoire by playing an Elf who wouldn't fully immerse himself in role-play. You never know, maybe the team would have to spend millions rescuing him...
  • Paton Oswalt: The comedian would play a Halfling Bard, adding additional humor in the fantasy game, perhaps highlighting the absurdity of the situation.

RDJ would be tasked with providing the narrative, stringing together the world of make-believe, and the authentic world of these A-listers enjoying a casual RPG session (I'm sure it happens in real life all the time). Alternatively, the actual players of the game could be a skinny, nerdy group of friends who see themselves as the above stars, and get them into crazy situations.

Anyway, if the premise itself isn't exciting enough in its own right, AmnesiaCane paints a colorful image of certain events he'd like to play out. Such as Crews and RDJ getting in an argument because Crews feels his armour is inadequate, with RDJ eventually backing down. Or, better still:

"I want to see Terry Crews roll a dice, get a perfect 20 and get really excited and start yelling, then cut to Crews in full body armor swinging a broadsword and chopping off an ogre's head in one blow and still yelling, then cutting back to Crews IRL again standing up, yelling, then looking around awkwardly and realizing he got too excited."

It's out there. It's out there on the world of the web and now its existence is known, this movie has to happen. The cast and plot could provide the perfect balance of comedy, fantasy and thrill. Plus, Dungeons and Dragons is facing a mini resurgence lately, thanks to its inclusion in Stranger Things. Now is as good a time as ever.

If they can make a Monopoly movie, they can make this.

On a scale of one to 10, how much do you want to see this happen? I'm at least a 12.5.

Huge kudos to AmnesiaCane for his ingenuity in thinking up the idea for the movie. Make sure you check out the full Reddit thread.


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