Set phasers to spectacular (has that pun run it's course already?) because Paramount Pictures' Star Trek Into Darkness has got US theaters locked in its tractor beam. It opened in the international markets last week to critical acclaim and grossed a respectable $31.7 million from seven territories and is now set to stun US audiences when it opens nationwide.
Into Darkness is the sequel to the riotously fun 2009-rebooted Star Trek, and sees the action pick up 12 months after the events of the original and with Starfleet facing their most dangerous threat yet.
I managed to catch the movie this week and its 90-minutes of balls-to-the-wall action and mayhem, that is more energized than a hyperactive kid that's drunk 17 cans of Red Bull on the way Disney Land. In honor of all the awesomeness, I present you with my Top 5 F@%k Yeah Moments from Star Trek Into Darkness.
Raiders of the Undiscovered Country
Taking an adrenalin-fueled leaf out of the Indiana Jones school of awesome movie openings, Star Trek Into Darkness propels us directly into some spectacular running, jumping and arrow dodging action. It's a breathtaking opening set piece that sees Kirk and Bones trying to escape some angry natives while Spock attempts to extinguish a volcano using a magic briefcase (that's definitely a thing). The action spectacular climaxes with the majestic sight of the Enterprise rising gloriously out of the ocean, while Spock is saved from a tidal wave of magma at the last nanosecond.
F@%k Yeah Rating- 9/10
Klingons were on the Starboard Bow (until John Harrison killed them all)
If there was any doubt about John Harrison's badassery, it was soon dispelled in a cacophony of shooting, smashing and breaking, as he decimated an entire squad of Klingons. With Kirk, Spock and Uhura at the mercy of the merciless Klingons, Harrison went nuclear, dispatching the blue-eyed bastards with military precision. He also wielded two guns, one of which was massive, scoring him extra f@%k yeah points.
F@%k Yeah Rating- 9.5/10
I'm going to include two f@%k yeah moments here as both concern the utterance of a very special name. There'd been rumors for months that 's villain was not John Harrison as the movie promos suggested, but was instead the most famous of Star Trek's bad guys, Khan Noonien Singh. The big reveal came when "Harrison" was being held captive in the glass case of emotion and admitted to a slightly baffled Kirk (but a jubilant audience) that he was actually KHAN! Tremendous stuff.
The second f@%k yeah moment came after Kirk had seemingly died of radiation poisoning. Witnessing the death of his close friend, Spock, filled with rage and remorse, bellowed out KHAAN!, riffing on Kirk's own rage belch in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan and making me give the guy sitting next to me an impromptu geek hug. He wasn't particularly impressed.
F@%k Yeah Rating- 7.5/10
Warp Speed Dead Ahead
Every time the Enterprise went into Warp speed I got a little bit light headed. There's something geekily magical about seeing a Starship slowly stretch out, before disappearing into the deepest reaches of space leaving a trail of a blue Warp dust (is that a thing?) in its wake. What could possible be cooler than that?
Having a space battle mid-warp, that's what.
As the Enterprise attempted to flee the deadly clutches of the USS Vengeance, it's blasted from behind, sending it crashing out of warp with all the violence of a pheasant that's been shot in the face mid-flight. In warp, nobody can hear you scream.
F@%k Yeah Rating- 7/10
The Enterprise is on Cloud 9, Vengeance is not
This is probably my favorite moment of the whole movie and most of it happened off camera. The Enterprise has been badly damaged in a firefight with Vengeance and is plummeting to Earth on a collision course with San Fransisco and total annihilation. Kirk sacrifices himself to save the ship by realigning the Warp Core, restoring power to the Enterprise and allowing it turn on its thrusters. Seemingly sinking like a stone beneath the clouds, the Enterprise suddenly emerges Leviathan-like, battered and bruised, to a soundtrack of bombastic music. That's more than can be said for Vengeance, which smashed into the San Fransisco bay causing well over $150 of damage. I still Khan't believe that Khan didn't bite the dust.
F@%k Yeah Rating- 8.34/10
F@%k No Moment!
Break a leg Ms Eve
You want to know why you shouldn't mess with Khan? Because he will happily snap your leg in half before literally squeezing the life out of your father, while you watch. He gives less of a s@%t about your feelings than a Honey Badger.
It's over to you guys now. Use the comment section below to let me know your f@%k yeah moments for Star Trek Into Darkness.