1. Pull A Louie
It's been proven that the left side of your face is smarter than the right. So when you are doing your next GQ layout, make sure the photographer knows that each time he shoots the right side of your face, one of his family or friends will be found bobbing feet-up in the North Bay Aqueduct.
2. Look Younger Than You Are
Youth implies vitality, so you can seem wiser than your years. Leo was nearly 50 when he took this picture a month ago. The old axiom is that you don't have to ever finish high school as long as you look like you're in high school. Just ask Leo, the only tests he's ever taken had two possible answers: Positive or Negative.
3. Period Pieces
Everybody knows that smart people are all old and boring. Also, they know historical stuff. So, next time your agent asks you whether or not you would prefer to make Scorsese's next three-hour-long epic love letter to New York City rather than a movie that people will like, just say 'Get me a hat!'.
4. Use Nature
If nature didn't look good in magazine photo shoots, it would have ceased existing years ago. So, for now until the time nature stops being useful, celebrities will continue to stand and gaze aloofly to the left, as often as they can.
Darkness is your friend. It's never easier to look dire, and pretend that you're thinking, than in actual darkness. During a photo shoot on Martha's Vineyard, Leo had his agent postpone sunrise for two hours to get a shot. It was worth it.