I recently made a list of best remakes in Horror. And it was a hit. People liked it a lot, and they asked me to make a list of worst remakes. Lets be clear. I am fine with remakes. Just I wish there was a few things. 1. Effort. At least show your trying to make a horror film, and not some jump-scare fest. 2. Be original. Now this one is hard to explain but what Im saying is have some original scenes, and have some new twists. Dont make it a carbon copy of the remake. Now with that lets begin
10. House of Wax (2005)
Has anyone seen that awesome House of Wax movie starring the Great Vincent Price. If you loved that then you will hate this. This movie has archtype characters. Like the stoner, the token black guy who dies, the nice guy, the bad boy, the virgin, and the paris hilton character. This movies changes the noir-esque story of the original to a cliche slasher movie.
9. The Haunting (1999)
How do you remake one of the scariest psychological movies of all time? Make it a cliche filled, bad CGI, sappy 'horror' film. This movie has some good casting, but other then that it takes away from the original's darker psychological side. The original suggested the house MAY be haunted, or it might be in the head of our crazy protagonist. Also casting Owen Wilson? seriously? He was terrible in this movie.
8. Carrie (2013)
I know people who liked this movie. I hated it. Carrie wasnt Carrie. Chloe Mortez was a terrible Carrie. She had the awkward thing down but she was to pretty. Hell she is the prettiest girl in the whole movie. And that is wrong because Carrie was never pretty in the book. Sissy Spacek worked because she was awkward and plain. She wasnt cute in the original she looked plain, and that helped the movie a lot. Also the bullying doesnt work. The reason why is the video tape carrie's period freak out. Now that would work....if Carrie ever goes online. Which she doesnt. Cyberbullying works if the victim goes online to see themselves being bullied. Other then that the cyberbullying idea doesnt work. Also the stuff the gym teacher does would never go by today. Back then in the 70s it would but it wouldnt be ok today. She would be fired fast. Julianne Moore was good as Margaret but she seems to comepletly despise Carrie. n the original and Book, you do see some form of caring and love for her daughter. In this one there is no sign of it. Another thing is the ending. Are they planning a sequel with Sue's baby? Didnt they remember the last sequel to Carrie?
7. Halloween (2007)
This one I debated putting lower on the list but then I decided no. This movie I will watch if I am bored. Other then that this movie is terrible. it has two good actors. Brad Dourif and Malcolm McDowell. But not even Chucky and Alex DeLarge can save this movie. This one is terrible because of horrible characters and writing. I didnt care for anyone in this movie except for Loomis and the Sheriff. The other characters were just jerks or just annoying. I hated Laurie in this movie. She wasnt sympatheitc at all. I didnt care about her one bit. The writing was another problem. People liked Michael as a kid but I thought that was a bad idea. Seeing a terrifying figure like Michael Myers as a snot-nosed brat was like seeing Darth Vadar as a bad acting brat(Looking at you Episode 1) Rob Zombie tried to make Michael sympathetic. The problem with that is your not supposed to feel sorry for evil. Pure Evil isnt supposed to be something you understand. It shouldnt need a motive. That was Carpenter's whole point of the original.
6. The Uninvited (2009)
This is a remake of one of my favorite movies. The South Korean master piece A tale of two sisters. Now while both had the same plot twist, the original made you not notice. It tricks you. And the original works. But with the remake does it, its obvious what the twist is. Also the addition of a boyfriend? Just felt lame, and unneeded. I just hated how this movie just ruined the original's tone and style. The original mixed the idea ghosts and the insanity of out main character's mind very well, that in the end you didnt know if there were ghosts, or if it was all in her head. In this one its all in her head. The original felt like a tragic ballet but this one just felt like a lame Lifetime original.
5. The Omen(2006)
This one had so much potential. It has great casting, and good cinematography. But it just falls flat. The kid who plays Damien, isnt scary. The original was scary because how regular he looked. He looked like any other kid, and when you saw him you couldnt tell he was the devil's son. But with this kid you can tell he is evil. Also the movie nearly identical to the original. Thats the problem it isnt original at all.
4. Psycho (1998)
This isnt just a story copy remake. this is a shot by shot remake. No originality at all. This movie also suffers from horrible casting. Vince Vaughn? Really? Why him? He is horrible as Norman Bates. And to Be honest I thought he would be good.....I was wrong.
3. The Wicker Man (2006)
On its own, this movie is freaking awesome. Its like Troll 2, and The Room. A movie so bad its great. But as a remake its terrible. They made the island women dominated, which is interesting but...is it pro or anti feminism. The movie sometimes makes no sense at all. Cage is terrible in this movie. It has so many stupid scenes, and thats what makes it so bad its good. But as a remake it sucks. Just dont bring Cage a basket of bees.
2. Halloween 2 (2009)
Remember how the first remake was decent enough to watch? This one isnt. This movie makes no sense at all. Laurie is worse now in this one, and shows no respect for Annie and her Dad for taking her in. You can say Yea she was attacked, and is still getting over it. Yes but so was Annie. She was nearly beaten and stabbed to death. Also whats the deal with the white horse and the 'dream sequences'? what point do they have? Also Why ruin Loomis? Why make him into a greedy dick? This movie is just trash all around, and proved Rob Zombie's film career was going down hill.
1. ALL THE PLATINUM DUNE REMAKES
No comment on this at all. We know why those remakes suck and I dont think I need to say why.
Images courtesy of Google images