ByColm S. Herron, writer at Creators.co
Colm S. Herron

With the buzz of [Star Wars: Episode VII](movie:711158) it's fair to assume that we're gonna see a wave of pop-up conventions and exhibitions in the run-up to the next movie. However, those who do wish to visit these, tread carefully. One exhibition in Wolfsburg, Germany, has proven that even the Millennium Falcon can look bad in the right light.

This is almost certainly the WORST STAR WARS EXHIBITION EVER.

It's literally like someone bought some knock-off costumes from the second mall in Mallrats the day after Halloween and decided to call it an exhibition.

Check out this list of ruin:

1. Chewbacca

Where does one start with this. It's literally a wig stapled to what could be absolutely anything. It's probably a Bane mask under there; they were quite popular these last few Halloweens.

It's hard to say ruined because it implies that somewhere in the past this was on it's way to being something good. That didn't happen. It was always crap.

2. Ewoks of Anarchy

I mean, this is ridiculous, an Ewok, with what looks like a walking stick without a handle, being used as a weapon no less. Then just a random minibike. What is going on at this place?

Ruined!

3. Leia

Right, so I think the photographer missed a trick with this one. Yeah Leia looks like a Costco manikin with the remnants of a garage sale painted or tied onto her. THIS is bad.

But what about that storm trooper. I wanna get a good look at him. What the f--k is going on there? We've got what looks like a dude dressed in a mime artist outfit with various sheets of white A3 paper wrapped around him. I really wish we could've seen that one. He looks to be dancing...

RUINED

4. Storm Troopers or Kraftwerk?

A car mechanic with welding goggles and a hat that, okay praise where it's due, does look like a Star Wars helmet. I think he was Han Solo's cousin and all his scenes were cut. He definitely wasn't thrown together for this exhibition (in name only), that would be insane. He has been sprayed silver... I'll just leave that out there.

Oh and please tell me that's not an attempt at a Tuskan Raider in the background. I think those Bane masks must've been on offer because he's got one too.

RUINED!

5. If you squint, then someone whispers the answer in your ear: It's Luke Skywalker

He's got green hair, perhaps a Hamill/Joker in-joke by the founders of the exhibition? Doubtful. There's a hand-me-down kung fu jacket from when one of the founders kids decided he was gonna do judo for a week at school; "like new". There are trousers that have been donated by a high ranking World of Warcraft player. Even the manikin looks like he doesn't know what's going on.

RUINED

6. Neil Armstrong inspecting the Millennium Falcon (WARNING: Not to scale)

I don't know who's brainchild this one was but it needs another once over. It looks as though Neil Armstrong is looking for the petrol cap and he's thinking to himself "It's under the number plate, I've seen one a these things before".

Seriously a NASA ASTRONAUT standing next to the MILLENNIUM FALCON.

A NASA ASTRONAUT STANDING NEXT TO THE MILLENNIUM FALCON!

RUINED!!!

It's not a good sign that I want to go to this thing out of morbid curiosity.

In retrospect I come back to what I said, to say this has ruined my childhood implies that there was hope for this at one point that someone thought it a good idea to drive the wagon onto the train tracks. Though I will say ruined because I don't think I can look at Star Wars or NASA again without thinking about this gathering of random objects from the second mall in Mallrats.

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