It's one thing to make a horror movie that's completely vile and disgusting, but a comedy? Any movie lover can be scared, but it takes a special kind of gloriously depraved mind to find that sick sh*t funny... A mind like mine...
Here are 8 of the blackest, darkest comedies to ever make my flinty little heart chuckle...
1. Vulgar (2000)
Who Should I Blame For This Filth? Bryan Johnson
Sick Quote: [lights blowtorch] "THIS is how I kiss... and I'm gonna kiss YOU all over..."
Ew. What Happens? A clown starts taking joke strip-a-gram jobs to make more cash, until he's raped by a bunch of lunatics. TV stardom, extortion and revenge ensue.
Sickest Moment: Remember that time I said a clown got gang raped?
2. Serial Mom (1994)
Who Should I Blame For This Filth? John Waters
Sick Quote: "I saw blood on the bottom of her shoes. Not exactly blood, it was gore, hanging there like a runny nose."
Ew. What Happens? A regular suburban housewife decides to start murdering neighbors and acquaintances for the most minor of impolitenesses.
Sickest Moment: A leg of lamb is used in an unholy fashion.
3. Happiness (1998)
Who Should I Blame For This Filth? Todd Solondz
Sick Quote: "Anyway, so the police came and looked in her freezer and found baggies filled with the doorman's genitals."
Ew. What Happens? Uh, well...there's a pedophile and a sex-pest phone caller. Basically a lot of weirdos get up to some perverted stuff.
Sickest Moment: A pedophile chats to his son about his sexual preferences.
4. Dead Snow (2009)
Who Should I Blame For This Filth? Tommy Wirkola
Sick Quote: "We've been attacked by what look like German zombies from the Second World War! And we set our cabin on fire by accident!"
Ew. What Happens? A bunch of bright young things get savagely attacked...by a horde of Nazi zombies.
Sickest Moment: Disembowelment by tree branch.
5. Tusk (2014)
Who Should I Blame For This Filth? Kevin Smith
Sick Quote: 'AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh.'
Ew. What Happens? Dude goes to interview weird old man. Weird old man kidnaps him and tries to turn him into a walrus with amateur surgery. Eat that, Human Centipede!
Sickest Moment: Amateur surgery - two words that should never appear together.
6. Society (1989)
Who Should I Blame For This Filth? Brian Yuzna
Sick Quote: "We're just one big happy family... except for a little incest and psychosis."
Ew. What Happens? Bill suspects something's not right with his rich, preppy family. Then he discovers their vile, incestuous secret...naturally, things go absurdly, nightmarishly downhill from there.
Sickest Moment: Oh, just look at the picture above.
7. Dead Alive (1992)
Who Should I Blame For This Filth? Peter Jackson
Sick Quote: 'That's my mother you're pissing on!'
Ew. What Happens? A Sumatran rat-monkey bites an old lady in New Zealand. Things get a bit zombified... and the humble lawn-mower becomes a deadly weapon.
Sickest Moment: Self-cannibalism at the dinner table.
8. Sightseers (2012)
Who Should I Blame For This Filth? Ben Wheatley
Sick Quote: "This is not my vagina!"
Ew. What Happens? A loved-up young couple take a road trip through idyllic rural England. They visit a pencil museum and do a lot of murders.
Sickest Moment: Let's just say...the road can be dangerous for cyclists.