Settle round children and let me tell you a story from a time long, long ago...
Back in the early noughties when Von Dutch hats were still socially acceptable and the sweet strains of Christina Aguilera's 'Dirty' filled the radiowaves, there was a beautiful bromance. Kevin Smith and Ben Affleck were the stuff of dude bro dreams until Jennifer Garner stepped in and destroyed it all. Kevin Smith cried about it forever. The end.
Despite the story being short enough to cram into one paragraph, Kevin Smith is still heartbroken about losing his boo and he is still laying the blame squarely at the door of Jennifer Garner.
At SSDC a fan asked Smith how Ben Affleck was getting on with [Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice](movie:711870) and the 43-year-old geek overlord wiped a single tear from his eye and gave the following answer:
Great question. I don’t know, because we’re not fucking tight. I have not been [close with him] in decades. That’s old Ben. He’s got a wife that don’t care for me at all [Laughs]. And plus, honestly, he probably don’t care for me at all anymore. He’s a triple-A-list movie star and shit like that. If he’s Jimmy Carter, I’m Billy Carter, to put it in ’70s terms. And I'm not even related and shit
Kevin is obviously really cut up about the bonds of brotherhood being severed because he also waxed poetic about his lost love with Affleck earlier this month at his Silent Bob Speaks show at Carnegie Hall. He explained that;
Jennifer does not share the same sense of humor as me — she did not like my jokes. I was picking on Ben Affleck making fun of him because I’ve known him for a really long time — I was talking smack — and Jennifer goes, ‘You know, if you keep saying stuff about him, I’m going to kick your ass.’ And she could — I’ve seen Alias. She has a real girly sense of humor and didn’t understand that I was kidding.
I remember talking to Ben and being like, ‘I know your lady is not finding me amusing. Ben, I’ve known you for years, and you are far sicker than I am!’ His jokes are way dirtier than mine. He’s made jokes to me, and I’ve been like, ‘Ben, you need to go to church
You gotta feel for the guy, it can't be easy having an ex best mate who is Batman when you are gagging for all of the scoops...
Do you think Jennifer Garner really destroyed Ben Affleck and Kevin Smith's relationship?
(Source: Yahoo Movies)