It is no secret that I have found this last season of True Blood to be an exercise in patience. After watching the latest episode, Almost Home, I truly do not know how to write a cohesive piece about what happened, or rather, what didn't happen. This episode could be summed up in a brief sentence or even one word. "Really?" So, I have, instead, chosen to share a running commentary of the episode.
Sarah F*cking Newlin is going to return as the Princess of Peace, the Messiah? Sure. O.K.
Hey Eric, welcome back. I missed you.
"Quiet Sookie is a thinking Sookie" At this point, I have a hard time believing that Sookie spends any time thinking at all. Bill really does loves Sookie. Watching the two of them reconnect, even if it's because Sookie infected him with Hep-V, is lovely. That being said, I am over this. Either kill Bill or give him the cure so they can live happily ever after. This romance has been dragged out for seven years. I would like a resolution, please.
For the love of all that is holy and unholy, what is up with all of these flashbacks? Three episodes left and we are retreading the history of Tara and Hoyt.
Thank you to whomever found those two beautiful tattooed men. I never tire of seeing men who have chosen to dress up their skin in traditional tattoos.
You know what I would watch? A spinoff show with Eric, Pam and the Yakuza. This is the only narrative that is at all interesting, amusing or engaging.
Kudos to Violet for really proving that old adage of a woman scorned. Violet is so pissed that she's going to kill a fairy. Her speech about being an even mightier feminine force than Helen of Troy or Cleopatra was amusing and it was definitely funny to see her go out while in the middle of her epic speech.
Uh duh, Jessica, Hoyt did not show up to rescue you. So, settle down.
This is what we have been waiting for with the Tara business? Are you kidding me? All of this time wasted on Lettie Mae and Tara could have been spent on, I don't know, something more productive. Was there a huge outcry for a Tara/Lettie Mae reconciliation that I was not aware of? I cannot believe that forgiveness is what all of this was about.
P.S. I'm still angered that Tara didn't receive a proper death scene.
Eric gets a second chance at the afterlife and he goes immediately to Sookie? That fairy chachi must really be magical.
Alright, full disclosure; when Jason and Jessica were having their heart to heart, I checked to see how much time was left in the episode. Oy vey! 20 minutes still?!
Pam, the look on your face when it was announced that Sookie was at Fangtasia, I believe spoke for all of us that have lost our love for Sookie. I believe your look said something along the lines of, "really, bitch? Eric, what is wrong with you?"
Oh Hoyt, bringing blood to Vampire Bill was awfully sweet. I love you. Will Jessica and Hoyt get a happily ever after? That would be nice.
Once again, thank goodness for that Underground Railroad running through Fangtasia.
My black heart was full of joy to see Eric and Bill back together. I have always enjoyed their antagonistic, brotherly relationship.
Bill doesn't want the cure? He has been alive long enough to know if he chooses not to continue to live. Will Sookie mess this up for him as well? Will she guilt him into taking the cure? It was very clear to everyone that Bill had a "come to Jesus moment" and he has made his choice. It will be interesting to see if he sticks with it.
Here we are with only two episodes left and a large portion of the Trubie community is just wishing for it to all be over. This seventh season must be what it feels like to be infected with Hep-V. It's excruciating and life draining, but I keep wanting more. At this point, I am with Vampire Bill. Someone put a stake in me because I am done.
Still, I choose to remain optimistic about the show's finale. Clearly, they are trying to give all of the characters some closure and, perhaps, when all of that is taken care of, we will be granted with a truly satisfying ending to a show that we have devoted seven years to. Fingers crossed.