Biker Zombies from Detroit - A Review by ArachnAsh
(Follow on twitter @ArachnAsh)WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD!Before I get into this review, it is quite clear that this wasn't going to be a good movie, based on the title itself. I simply watched it because the title was intriguing, and sometimes they provide us with a good laugh or two.Well, this one certainly delivered on that front.As far as the plot goes for this movie, I wasn't too sure what it was. From what I could tell, it was about a teen and his mom moving to a new city, and just getting settled in, when Ken has a run in with the zombie biker gang.The movie was slow to start, with getting to know the characters. Eventually it does pick up, though it takes time. A lot of time.The film quality was pretty bad. It looked like it was being filmed with just a regular video camera rather than film. The picture was grainy, and the audio wasn't that great either. Sometimes it was easy to understand when the actors spoke, but other times they sounded distant, and were barely audible.Eventually you start to get to see the zombies in action, starting when they decide to invade a gas station. Though, the scene doesn't last long. You do get to see a zombie do a brief dance while being shot at, but they soon off the gas station attendant, and disappear onto the road on their bikes.Things start to pick up when Ken meets Courtney, and soon they fall in love. OH GOD, WHAT IS THAT MUSIC THAT'S PLAYING!? MAKE IT STOP!Ahh, that's much better... Anyways, where was I? Oh yes!Soon, it seems like the zombies are being hand-picked, but by whom...? So far, he's just a disembodied voice.Some of these fighting scenes are fantastic. I mean, they're so believeable! *Ahem* That was sarcasm. But, I give them props for trying! The sound effects are definitely entertaining if nothing else. Definitely easy to tell that they don't belong. It almost makes me think that I'm watching a comic-based cartoon during a fight scene. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about!We find ourselves at our next slaughter scene: the diner. I never really understood this scene. Once again, the zombie bikers show up, walk in with patrons screaming and attempting to run, but doing a very poor job at it, and one by one they are picked off like cattle. What I didn't understand was after the zombies butchered everyone there, they didn't feast like a "normal" zombie would. They claimed someone's head, and promptly left. Now those are some organized zombies.This time we get to follow the zombies to their "base". It appears someone is leading the zombies in their bloodbath. But once again, it's just a disembodied voice giving them orders.There's a metal band that appears at this point in what looks like a tiny club. Did I mention they're terrible? It didn't sound like they were in tune most of the time, and the actual music...Not much happens at this point other than a brief confrontation between Ken and his neighbours who have a testosterone complex. Eventually, the zombies come across Ken, appear to kill him, and scare his neighbours off. Is that a green screen I spot? Now we're getting high-tech!Now comes the part that probably made me laugh the hardest. The day after Ken is killed, he reappears as a zombie (shocker!), and proceeds to kill one of the neighbours by shoving a tailpipe up the guy's tailpipe. Classic! After that, it isn't too eventful. The other main characters are killed off, we FINALLY get to see the owner of the disembodied voice, who appears to be some sort of red demon. Lucifer?All in all, this movie was good for a laugh, but there really wasn't a storyline, the acting was poor, the quality was terrible, and the effects were horrific. So, if you're looking for something cheesy that you'd like to have a good laugh at, then this is a good movie for you.If not, don't bother, because you'll be greatly disappointed.