It's the holidays and everyone knows what that means. It's time to watch all of your very favorite and treasured horror films. While we all like to tout our impeccable taste, we must all admit to a less than Oscar worthy movie love. Your personal favorite may not even be worthy of a Razzie, but who cares! It's the holidays bitches, and that means anything goes!
Of course, with my exceptional taste and stellar standards for film (still waiting on that sarcasm font, nerds) my fave B-movie is practically Oscar worthy;especially by Full Moon standards. Subspecies brings us the age old story of brother vs. brother. In this case, it's Radu vs. Stefan. Radu is the evil brother who has been in exile and has returned to claim the bloodstone. The bloodstone is said to be bleeding the blood of all saints and it's much too powerful for someone as nasty as Radu. Enter Stefan; the uber dreamy brother with a gorgeously full head of mahogany hair with a heart pure as gold. Subspecies came out in 1991 and Stefan still makes me swoon today just the same as he did the first time I laid eyes on him.
Our two token Americans, Michelle and Lillian, are joining their friend Mara in Pledmar, Transylvania to attend the Festival of the Undead. This festival celebrates the night that the vampires saved the people of Pledmar. Of course, because they are American, they are loud, bossy and have no respect for the local customs which is a good thing, because that also means that they have no qualms about breaking into Castle Vladislav despite it being the dumbest idea ever. This little faux pas leads to Radu being alerted to their presence and you can pretty much guess how everything goes from here. Vampires, girls, blood, wooden stakes, proclamations of love, bad dialogue, great use of shadows and all around awesome vampire storytelling.
Truly, Subspecies has it all. Vampire brothers battling for dominance, a love story, annoying American tourists, a token local woman who tells spooky stories, shortcuts through the woods at night, mom jeans and an old dude who is a secret badass. What more could you possibly want? Boobies? Alright, you got them! We even have little demon helpers that look like they wandered off of the set of a Sinbad movie.
Yes, Radu is usually drooling blood and he has really long fingers. He can break the tips of these eerie fingers off and watch them turn into the little demons that I spoke of. Really, they are super helpful and I wouldn't mind having some of my own. Radu uses the three girls as pawns in his game to take over Castle Vladislav and conquer Stefan. Armed with his Robert Smith hair, super white skin, creepy hands and a really awful speaking voice, he is tons of fun and one of those baddies that is really easy to side with. Obviously, I love Stefan and want him to win, but Radu is a pretty awesome villain which would explain why his character demanded sequels; though neither sequel lives up to the original, the entire series is just fun. That's the brilliance of Full Moon entertainment; they know exactly what they are good at and they excel at it.