ByKarly Rayner, writer at Creators.co
Movie Pilot's celebrity savant
Karly Rayner

Movie censorship is a touchy subject. While some purists are on a mission to make movies as clean as they want to believe their minds are, others are gunning for pedal-to-the-metal bloodshed and boning.

As if these opposing views - and all of the opinions in between - weren't complicated enough, movies are often censored into oblivion when they make the perilous journey to international shores.

But, what exactly do censorship bodies around the world find mortally offensive? Check out the list below and prepare to be surprised!

Titanic 3D

The Chinese government's treatment of Titanic 3D is a clear indication that they view their citizens as a rabble of perverted peasants with no impulse control.

Kate Winset's infamous topless scene was cropped from the 3D version of the movie due to fears that the general public would uncontrollably grope the air trying to cop a feel of Rose's Tit-anics.

An official issued the following statement explaining their grave fears:

Considering the vivid 3D effects, we fear that viewers may reach out their hands for a touch and thus interrupt other people's viewing

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Wolf of Wall Street

With a jaw-dropping 500 F bombs, The Wolf of Wall Street contains enough obscenity to make 10,000 grandmothers weep, but it was the sexual deviancy that got India's panties in a twist.

The censorship board got out their scissors and snipped out a gay orgy, Jonah Hill's public display of self abuse, and Leonardo DiCaprio blowing coke into a woman's back end.

The phrase "all nuns are lesbians" was also removed due to guidelines stating that all religions should be respected.

The movie fared worse in Dubai though, where a quarter of the three hour epic was removed making the movie jumbled, confusing and pretty much unwatchable according to irate audiences.

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Back to the Future and Time Travel in General

Bizarrely, China passed a censorship law in 2011 that targets "frivolous" time travel movies and TV shows.

Officials claim that the fantastical nature of time travel plots lack "positive thoughts and meaning" and are deemed "unhealthy" for the mental state of the masses.

Which, loosely translated, simply means another restriction of freedom of expression to try and quell dissidence within the state and stop people "treating the serious history in a frivolous way."

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Kill Bill

When Kill Bill was edited to appear on American TV, things got a little odd.

Scenes of attempted rape, ultra violence, and spurting fountains of gore were deemed totes okay, but the words "fuck" and "pussy" crossed the line of acceptability, goddammit!

When the predatory Buck tries to rape The Bride while she is unconscious, instead of delivering the poetic rhyme of "My name's Buck, and I'm here to fuck," he utters "My name's Buck, and I'm here to party."

Buck's perversion is also shoved to the back of the closet when his raunchy ride is renamed "The Party Wagon" because "pussy" had censors reaching for the smelling salts in horror.

So, with two small changes, Buck goes from a pussy obsessed sex offender to a guy who just really likes a good night out.

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Ice Age 4

In order to gain the coveted British U rating that ensures movies are squeaky clean enough for the tiniest, most youthful minds, Ice Age 4 had to wash it's mouth out with soap.

The zany critters weren't dropping any F bombs though, instead they opted for the much more offensive use of the word "spastic" which is an archaic term to describe someone with cerebral palsy.

Keepin' it classy!

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South Park: Bigger Longer and Uncut

Fun Fact: The MPAA aren't too enthused about the use of the word 'hell' in titles, but they are totally down with giant, uncircumcised wangs. Who knew!

According to South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone, their original title of South Park: All Hell Breaks Loose was rejected because all titles are required to be G rated, even if the movie happens to feature German scheisse porn and the phrase "donkey-raping shit-eater."

Parker and Stone were enraged by the double standard applied to their censorship mocking movie (After all, From Hell was totally cool) so they decided to go for a double entendre dick joke instead.

Clearly the MPAA was far too innocent and pure to see the filth in the title and gave the new 'clean' version their stamp of approval.

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Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End

Ironically, the only Chinese Pirates of the Caribbean character was totally lopped out of the Chinese release.

Chow Yun-fat's swashbuckling performance as Captain Sao Feng was judged as promoting offensive racial stereotypes and he was forced to walk the plank before the movie was sanitized enough for public consumption.

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Talladega Nights (and Literally Everything Else)

Iran might be famous for enforcing female modesty with an iron fist, but they aren't too happy about guys getting topless either!

Will Ferrel's shirtless scene in Talladega Nights was hidden from view with the addition of a nice, tactful concrete wall that only left the actors head peeking out.

Every foreign film that makes its way into Iran is given similarly heavy handed treatment, with women totally cropped out of shots if they are too close to men, or if their behavior is deemed inappropriate.

And, ghastly cleavages like the ostentatious flesh festival below are replaced with entirely more "innocent" jugs.

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(Source: Listverse, The Telegraph, Hollywood Reporter, The Atlantic, The Hollywood Reporter)

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