ByMartha Mae, writer at
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Ever wonder how love can make you go beyond what you have imagined before? Well, the sweet touch that lingers into your soul had just only begun.

Have you ever tried writing down all the qualities you really want for a girl or a man of your dreams? Have you ever imagined how it can make you realized that it was totally impeccably impossible? Okay, I am sure that even you didn’t ink it, you just had it in your mind. But that’s just what feelings of love make you especially when you meet the one you didn’t expect to come and touch your life. Just like this ever genius writer, Calvin who just fell in love with the girl whom he just imagined and wrote about — Ruby Sparks.

I know probably, I’m too ridiculously out-of-date to watch this movie but I can swear a thousand times that it got hit me through my nerves. Not just because how romantic it is with a twist of fun and humorous acts of these actors, but the message of the movie that pulled me to think beyond how relationship works.

Calvin who is an instant famous writer of his novel, “Heartbroken Old Times”, started to write about Ruby — who just passed by twice in his dreams. He then got up on his couch and just started to write about her. Then he just suddenly fell in love with the girl who surprisingly happened to live in reality. All words that Calvin used in his story suddenly came to reality. Ruby Sparks came literally alive in front of him.

And this how their charming and fun relationship worked. But I don’t think it’s too charming and fun to look at in that way. I see it as if you’re pushing too much for your partner. That’s a pressure! Comparing it to reality, this is just a highly one-way communication of love. Calvin used his words to make Ruby behave just the way he wanted to be. Every memory they shared together was all but made of his misery and loneliness. A not too sociable guy who wanted a girl to stick on his side and make him feel like there’s forever. Each word Calvin used makes Ruby follow it and starts acting on it.

I see two things on how it reflects to reality, First, it’s like how the man tortures a woman to stay with him even she’s living in a miserable life with him. Words can hurt one’s heart. Even you don’t really like to stay for longer, even every single time you take with him makes you want to go out and find something meaningful for your life. Imagine how life would it be if you’re imprisoned by his words and you can’t get out of it because that’s what makes you stay? Such a crap, right? A piece of sheet paper you can tear apart as you experience it! It is perceivable that woman couldn’t handle things when she is tied up by a man who makes her life not worth living. The character of Calvin here depends on the concept of “I”. He’s becoming selfish in terms of treating Ruby as his own possession — it’s too negative to perceive at. It doesn’t work all the time. Thus, it must take a balance in a relationship. This is how it is.

And secondly, the stage in relationship where you find comfortability with each other and makes it no sense at all. It is a stage when normal things you do are just boring. You two go out every single day, clinging to each other every time you’re together, kissing and hugging each other all the time. What an awful relationship you have! Yes, it is! You don’t miss each other because you always. You spend time seeing each other even when there’s a part of you that you want to wander and meet new people. The world doesn’t just revolve around you two! Go out and make new friends. Balance the relationship. Make some space but not for too long. Well, I believe, that’s a one way to have an almost perfect relationship — not perfect but almost. Or should I say a mature type of relationship.

However, if this did not work, maybe you just have to let go and accept the fact that, “People are meant to fall in love with each other, BUT NOT MEANT TO BE TOGETHER.” (excerpt from 500 Days of Summer — one of my fave movies!) And no matter how hard you try, there is a certain part of you where you just have to let go of it and find new purpose and start anew. That’s life as we know it. If it’s giving you the unforgettable heart-wrenching moment of your life, then let go. Make your life better with someone else. Experiences teach us who we want to be. And, so be it. ‘Cause maybe one day that guy or girl might be gone without you knowing it. Then how could you start over?

And starting over is a part of your life. Meeting someone new is a part of starting over. It is not just you use it for the same reason for the same person. However, if you really want to try it again to the same person, then be it. There are always second chances to start over. Chances won’t last but be sure to make it last with someone whom you share your love with. Nevertheless, it’s you who made the decision and would probably and completely face the consequences. Enjoy and live life.

Thanks to this movie who made me realize how epic the twists and turns of love and relationship. I have high respect for Zoe Kazan as the writer of this movie and who also played the role as Ruby. High five to you! I bow my respect to you next to Emma Watson.


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