It seems the lovable Winnie The Pooh is causing quite a stir in a small town in Poland - and you'll never guess why.
No, it's not because the classical Disney creation has stolen the entire town's supply of honey (or 'Hunny' as he'd adorably, if incorrectly, spell it), but because of some of Pooh's possible life-style choices.
Apparently, the council members of the town of Tuszyn in central Poland have decided Pooh is too depraved to feature as the mascot for a local playground (I doubt this was a joint-venture Disney were actually made away of).
The main crux of the issue appears to be Winnie's "dubious sexuality," "inappropriate dress," and lack of genitals - because as everyone knows, mascots with visible genitals are much more appropriate for a child's playground...
Half-naked bears a no-no
According to the Croatian Times, councillor Ryszard Cichy, 46, stated:
The problem with that bear is it doesn't have a complete wardrobe. It is half naked which is wholly inappropriate for children.
This is an accusation Winnie The Pooh certainly can't refute - he does only wear a tiny shirt that barely covers anything at all. However, Cichy felt a much more tasteful alternative would be a traditional fictional Polish bear which is a bit more inclined to hide its shame. He continued:
Ours is dressed from head to toe, unlike Pooh who is only dressed from the waist up.
Next it seems the discussion headed to Pooh's lack of genitals (which does raise the issue of why they were concerned with his nudity in the first place). Another councillor added:
It doesn't wear underpants because it doesn't have a sex. It's a hermaphrodite.
Just so we're clear here. A hermaphrodite has both male and female reproductive organs - not a lack of any at all.
Pooh has been castrated?
At this point, councillor Hanna Jachimska began accusing Winnie The Pooh author, Alan Alexander Milne, of castrating the bear - with a razor blade no less.
This is very disturbing but can you imagine! The author was over 60 and cut his [Pooh's] testicles off with a razor blade because he had a problem with his identity.
Now, I know life in a small central Polish town is probably a bit rougher than elsewhere - but what the hell goes on in Tuszyn for 'razor blade castration' to be their first explanation for a cartoon character's lack of balls?
Of course, what the esteemed councillors of Tuszyn seem to have forgotten is that Pooh isn't actually a bear - but a teddy bear. Now, I don't know about you, but I think it's quite all right for teddy bears not to have realistic genitalia sewn onto them - and I really don't want to meet the guy who disagrees with me on that issue.
Winnie The Pooh is...
Source: The Hollywood Reporter