ByDave Conley, writer at Creators.co
"Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules."
Dave Conley

While out promoting her latest movie The Boy Next Door Jennifer Lopez put it out there to Greg Silverman (President, Creative Development & Worldwide Production: Warner Bros. Pictures) that she wanted to play a superhero.

Well that ones taken
Well that ones taken

Hey, who doesn't want to get on that bandwagon these days? Hopefully it's not just to work with Ben Affleck again though. That was no Thanksgiving dinner!

Yes, that was from Gigli. With a 6% rating on the tomato-meter this is probably one of the worst movies of this century and it had Christopher Walken and Al Pacino in it! So it was no surprise that people reacted as badly as when Affleck was first announced as Batman.

Really, Do we need more O's?
Really, Do we need more O's?

However, some people gave Affleck props for his work since then so lets give her some. I mean Gigli was just about as long ago as Daredevil and they keep letting her make movies so she must be doing something right. Let's see...

She's the only person to ever have a number one album and a number one movie in the same week! She is the highest paid Latina actress in the business and has put together some strong performances in films like Selena, Maid In Manhattan, Shall We Dance, and Monster-in-Law. She started out as a fly girl on the sketch comedy show In Living Color. She has been successful in Music, movies and television. Few people have done that and none of them have her infamous booty!

Yes but she mainly does romantic comedies you say? Well she did make the movies Money Train, Enough, and Anaconda! In 2013 she was in the movie Parker with Jason Statham; not much action for her but her acting wasn't all that bad in it.

So I say why not lets pretend she has some dirt on Affleck or we live in a world where she has to play a superhero. I figure it would have to be a lesser known character so maybe she wouldn't get as much flack as her ex. So I searched images and DC databases to try and help Mr. Silverman find a suitable vehicle for Ms. Lopez to wield her super ass-ets!

She looks good in red
She looks good in red
So bee red!
So bee red!

Red Bee

Jenna Raleigh

The grandniece of the original, Jenna, takes up the mantle of the Red Bee. She uses a mechanized battle suit and two robotic bees that can fire electricity. Jenna is mutated by an alien insect colony into a human/insect hybrid, with enhanced physical abilities, pheromone production capabilities, and antennae on her head. So if J Lo bugs you there ya go.

Why you acting like that? She says she's got more booty for you! Which made me think maybe she could be half of this team

No I mean this team!

Nice, uh, artwork!
Nice, uh, artwork!

Fire

Beatriz Bonilla da Costa, alias Fire followed an unusual career path, starting as an amateur model on the beaches of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil then becoming a showgirl and stage performer (sound familiar?) before finding herself serving as an undercover secret agent for the Brazilian government. In the course of one of her missions, she was exposed to the accident which granted her super-human powers. She might have to learn Portuguese though or maybe not.

She does look good in green!
She does look good in green!

Bulleteer

Alix Harrower the wife of a scientist that develops a metal skin that bonds to human skin and gives them super human strength. Unfortunately it kills him and infects her. Luckily she is saved because she's wearing her wedding ring. I really just thought it would be funny to see J Lo wearing a pointy helmet and for the bullet proof booty jokes.

Can't you just see it?
Can't you just see it?

Hawk Woman

She is too old to be Hawk Girl so

That's Hawk Woman to you!
That's Hawk Woman to you!
Put a mask on her and...
Put a mask on her and...

Remember she does look good in Green so why not as a part of the Green Lantern Corps!

You can take that dress to the bank!
You can take that dress to the bank!

At three centuries of age, this female lantern of the planet Bellatrix was recruited by the sphere-like Chaselon of Barrio III to join the then-reconstituted Green Lantern Corps. Mostly I like this one purely for the joke potential,

Can I please get a hand (she's missing one) for Boodika!

See what I did there?
See what I did there?

Thank you and good night don't forget to tip your waiters and please feel free to write your suggestions, snide and/or snarky comments below.

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