ByThy Critic Man, writer at Creators.co
Thy Critic Man

The 80’s…

…an era where slashers sliced and diced their way to the top of the horror scene…

…these days are long gone.

The first fifteen years of the 2000’s featured more ghosts and demonic possessions than they did unstoppable monsters or folks who have the ability to wield kitchen knifes better than the top chefs in the world. Sure, we have witnessed the birth of Mick Taylor and the Wolf Creek franchise. Yeah, Saw and Jigsaw have made a huge impact in the horror game. Fair enough that Victor Crowley from Hatchet, Chromeskull from Laid to Rest, and Leslie Vernon from Behind The Mask have also made considerable impacts on horror fans. However, if you mention any of these names to a casual movie-goer who does not know a single thing about horror, I bet you only Jigsaw can possibly ring a bell. They aren’t nearly as popular as good old Leatherface, Freddy Krueger, Michael Myers, Chucky, or Jason Voorhees. It is the demons of Paranormal Activity or the titles with the devil in them that sell tickets these days. I’m at the point where I’m tired of demons. It is a new year and 2015 offers a new slasher flick in the form of Desecrated. Is this our chance to relive the glory days once again?

The plot is simple enough. Haylie Duff plays a wealthy girl named Allie McClean. She takes her friends up to her isolated ranch house for a fun weekend of the usual stuff. The usual stuff isn’t as fun as usual due to a grumpy caretaker who doesn’t usually like visitors. Unless they are dead. He sure seems to have fun killing his visitors. We should be able to have fun watching him kill his visitors, right? I don’t think I did. Everything about Desecrated is done in the most bland way possible. The characters? Bland. The only character who is not bland is an obnoxious prick. Nothing more. His girlfriend is a pretty lady with an accent. Nothing more. Allie is a nice girl who plays the lead. Nothing more. Her boyfriend is the guy who takes charge. Nothing more. The remaining girl thinks the caretaker is good-looking. She wants to bang him. Nothing more. The final dude is kind of a wimp. He is Paul James from Greek and I know for a fact that he is quite good as an actor. This performance does not do him any good though. They are all incredibly dumb to the point where they are challenging to sympathize with. The killer himself is the most interesting character in the movie. Gonzalo Menendez does not come close to Christian Bale in American Psycho and falls short of Wolf Creek‘s Mick Taylor, but his psychopath military man is entertaining enough. With that said, I doubt he will be capable of haunting anyone’s nightmares once the film comes to an end.

This isn’t a big-budget film. I don’t feel like ripping apart the filmmakers on how everything looks and sounds. It isn’t impressive. I’ll leave it at that. This is a cliche-ridden film with twists that don’t really seem needed once everything is all said and done. I wasn’t entertained the slightest bit by anything that occurs throughout this film. Mick Taylor is still the most entertaining slasher of the 2000’s in my opinion.

Follow me on Instagram (thycriticman) and on Twitter (@ThyCriticMan) because…why the hell not?

Superpower Film Scale: 1.5/5

1: Villainous Waste

2: Careless Bystander

3: Hero unaware of powers

4: On the verge of greatness

5: Heroic film

Standout acting heroes: Gonzalo Menendez

Trending

Latest from our Creators