Hey! Do you believe everything you read on the internet!? Then listen to this! Mitchell Stevenson, a reporter I just made up, of the Washington Times reported, for no reason at all, that Captain America is officially 100% confirmed to appear in Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice!
(SPOILER ALERT) If you are going to continue reading please be aware that you will be spoiling the rumors for a movie that I just made up and am now passing on to you as truth. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Stevenson released the information in a post to the Times’ site earlier this week. In it he says, “I saw a piece of paper on the street being blown by the wind. When I picked it up it was wet and dirty and the print had been kind of smudged, but I was able to make out the letters D and C at the top and the name Chris mixed into a messy, hand-written paragraph.”
Now, I don’t know about you, but to me that sounds like he stumbled upon a contract that links DC to Captain America actor Chris Evans! Which would certainly have to mean that he is playing Cap in the upcoming Dawn of Justice.
And as if the now-pronounced-certainly-a-contract wasn’t enough to confirm this, Stevenson asked Evans himself. “When I asked Mr. Evans if he was going to appear in an upcoming DC movie, he smiled and said ‘That’s ridiculous’. But what did he mean by that?”
Stevenson is asking all of the right questions. Evans didn’t exactly outright deny appearing in a DC film. And what was with the smile he gave before answering? This sounds a lot like a cover up to me.
And before you go saying, “This is stupid. No, this is completely ridiculous. Why would Captain America appear in a Batman and Superman movie? Stop wasting our time with such ridiculous garbage!”, consider this! In the fight scene in Man of Steel that nearly completely levels Smallville, Superman is thrown through a wall. If you look in the background at this exact moment, you can see a metallic trash can, complete with metallic lid. Haven’t we seen someone pick up a lid like that before?
Coincidence? I think not!
So there you have it, the theory makes sense and the Marvel and DC cinematic universes are clearly shared. You can take this information and post it to Facebook, Twitter and any other outlet you feel is reasonable because there is absolutely not a chance in the world that it is false and there is no way anyone will call you stupid for believing it. As a matter of fact, if you share it quickly enough, people might actually think you originally reported it!
If you enjoyed this post and you are always willing to take everything you read as absolute truth and not just some bored fans’ theories, check out my other posts:
Peter Jackson’s 7th Lord of the Rings Film to Feature Han Solo!
Aquaman: A Fictional Character? Or a Government Cover up?