ByJess Goodwin, writer at
social media coordinator at Nickelodeon's '90s Nostalgia brand NickSplat :: on Twitter @thejessgoodwin
Jess Goodwin

Oftentimes, in the name of creativity (or simply to avoid giving places like McDonald's and Burger King free advertising), filmmakers and TV show creators will invent new restaurants for their characters to patronize.

Of course, what they usually don't realize is they're inventing places real people will actually want to go. I myself am a burger junkie, so without further ado, I present the top fictional burger joints that need to open up in the real world.

1. Bob's Burgers, Bob's Burgers

I don't know about you, but I'm all about food puns, and Bob's Burgers is at the top of the pun game. When I see such delicacies as A Leek of Their Own, Eggers Can't Be Cheesers, and If Looks Could Kale, I just want to head to Maine (which is where the show takes place in my head), pull up a stool, and take life notes from Tina. If ever there was a time for Fox to get in the restaurant game, this is it.

2. Chubbie's Famous, Boy Meets World

Many an important moment took place in Chubbie's — Shawn had his big "Chick Like Me" date, Topanga broke up with Cory, and we learned you can collect the clown hats from the Clown Burger. Plus, there's a pool table — the marking of any establishment worth its salt. Plus, the success of Girl Meets World surely has fans of the original series feeling nostalgic.

3. Mooby's, Dogma (and various other Kevin Smith films)

Most places don't like to so prominently feature the animal whose meat they're selling, but that's what makes Mooby's so special. While patrons stuff their faces with Mooby meat and fries, they get to stare up at the golden calf himself. I don't know about you, but I want to grab a Mooby's kids meal so I can get a little golden Mooby of my own. Kevin Smith, I know you can make this happen.

4. Honker Burger, Doug

I — along with a lot of other people, most likely — have no interest in eating anything involving beets, but considering the odds of running into the Beets, I'd have been happy to spend my formative years here. There should at least be an ironic bar or dance club somewhere going by the Honker Burger, where you can get beet juice and listen to a Beets cover band.

5. The Max, Saved by the Bell

Not only do you get burgers and fries, but you might just get the occasional magic show, musical performance, or Zack Morris dressing up like a woman to help out a pal. Who wouldn't go to the Max?

6. Paunch Burger, Parks and Recreation

Admit it — the #2 sounds like a dream. A "Double Bacon Grenade Deluxe," hash browns, chili cheese fries, and a poached egg? Yes, please. Check my cholesterol, declare me unfit for living, and send me to that big fat burger joint in the sky. NBC should, at the very least, open up a Paunch Burger in their New York City headquarters.

7. Big Kahuna Burger, Pulp Fiction (and various other Quentin Tarantino films)

On the surface, the Big Kahuna Burger's main dish — aptly titled the Big Kahuna Burger — is pretty easy to make. It's a standard cheeseburger, topped with bacon and a couple slices of pineapple.

However, Food Republic sees things differently, adding in a few surprise ingredients — like cilantro and Sriracha — to its recipe. Shortlist also has a recipe for the pineapple-free version, courtesy of chef Dave Watts.

See, now, if there was an actual Big Kahuna Burger (or 50) out there, we could skip the debate and just pick up the real thing. Your move, Tarantino.


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