ByKarly Rayner, writer at
Movie Pilot's celebrity savant
Karly Rayner

If you're not familiar with the horned, child devouring monster that pays a visit to Austrian and German kids on Christmas Eve, then I'd like to introduce you to Krampus.

While the relatively benign Santa might sort out who's naughty and nice and leave the odd pass-agg piece of coal, Krampus' sole occupation is to punish unruly whippersnappers by whipping them, drowning them, devouring them or dragging them directly to hell. All perfectly reasonable.

The mere premise of Krampus might be pretty bizarre in it's own right, but the depictions of this slightly over-dramatic dude through the ages are a whole new level of creepy.

So, be thankful Christmas is months away, and take a look at my favorite examples below:

Blue Sky Thinking

Image: CBS News

Krampus likes to spend his days daydreaming about Persian kittens softly stroking his face.

Drowned Deliqunet

Image: Truth Sayer

Ummm, did you tell Triton what you were going to do with that fork, Krampus? I know he hates humans, but this is a step too far!

Nightmare Nursery

Image: Scott Farrell

Yeah, getting down on your knees is probably as good an idea as any.

Dark Alley Demon

Image: Mr-Nick

This supremely stupid child deserves to be eaten really...

Pretty Little Liar

Image: Dave

You won't be fibbing about who really broke mommy's favorite vase next year, will you sweetie?

Demonic Dolly

Image: The Forgotten Friends

Just what I want for Christmas! I doll whose halitosis will keep me awake at night!

Highway to Hell

Image: Truth Sayer

Or the drowning well, whichever one's closer TBH.

Model Monster

Image: The Lahey Blog

Work it, Krampus!

Nothing Weird About Me

Image: Io9

Note how much the child is trembling.

Nope. Nope. Nope.

Image: Truth Sayer

That's a bit rich even for you, Krampus!

Your Chariot Awaits!

Image: The Daily Mail

I hate to break it to you, but sometimes these guys travel in packs.

Burning Passion

Image: Cvlt Nation

Just casually roasting all of the joy out of your heart, nothing to see here.

He's Behind You!

Image: George Brett

I'm going to assume these are unassuming pupil's from the local blind school, because these kids really shouldn't look so happy.

Odd Feet?!

Image: Studio 360

Well, that gives a whole new meaning to the phrase 'tongue lashing.'

Straight Out of Kramp-ton

Image: Truth Sayer

These guys have got their game face on.


Do you think adopting the tradition of Krampus might terrify kids into being better behaved?

(Source: Io9)


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