Ghosts are always pretty creepy, but few are more terrifying than the dreaded poltergeist.
Although most ghostly apparitions are content to just wail, create light breezes or appear as ambiguous blobs on blurry photos, poltergeists take it further by getting physical and aggressive with their tormentees. Here are five such poltergeists.
The Mackenzie Poltergeist
The Greyfriars cemetery in Edinburgh, Scotland is famous for many reasons. One is quite adorable, and another is pretty terrifying.
The former story tells of Greyfriar's Bobby, a 19th century dog which stood guard over his owner's grave for 14 years. The latter story tells of an evil ghost which has attacked countless tourists and locals.
In 1998, a homeless man broke into the tomb of George Mackenzie in order to find shelter from the cold. Not content to simply get a roof over his head, he decided to actually climb into the coffin - and this is when things started to go weird. Apparently the coffin crumbled around the man, and terrified, he fled out into the cemetery covered in the bone meal of the coffin's original occupant.
Soon, strange things started happening around the tomb. 350 people have claimed to have been attacked around it, with some even claiming broken bones. Additionally, 170 people have claimed to blackout around the mausoleum. Following these attacks, the council were forced to close the area around the tomb until they were eventually persuaded to reopen it by a local tour guide.
The South Shields Poltergeist
England also seems to have its fair share of nefarious ghosts. One of the most well-known apparently haunts a house in the coastal town of South Shields.
This poltergeist started out with some simple entry-level haunting. Y'know, moving furniture, slamming doors, creating a general atmosphere of unease, but soon he graduated to some seriously messed up sh*t.
His particular penchant appeared to be throwing around the cuddly toys of the unnamed couples three-year-old child and leaving the family terrifying messages. Indeed, he reportedly even haunted their phones, sending the couple messages like "You're Dead", while he he also wrote 'Just Leave Now' on the child's magnetic drawing toy.
The couple's son would also go missing from time to time, only to be found cowering in cupboards and hiding under tables. On one occasion, the ghost even attacked the couple in their bed, apparently scratching one down the back. Conveniently, the scratches were gone the next morning. Spooky.
Stoke Lacy's Haunted Fence
Keeping it in England for a while. Some claim the small village of Stoke Lacy has a poltergeist which haunts a fence. Apparently, the ghost is taking control of people's cars and plunging them into the same fence over-and-over again. Over an 18-month period, 26 cars smashed into the barrier.
Of course, it could simply be explained by the fact it's a really dangerous road or that the drivers are speeding, but where's the spooky fun in that? Instead some have claimed they felt a ghostly hand grabbing the wheel of their cars and driving them into the fence - with some cars even rolling over.
However, things get creepy when local councillor, Richard James, was approached by a man in the pub he didn't recognize. The man claimed to be a psychic who stated that a woman died on that very road in the 1930s! Apparently, there was a struggle for the wheel and she now wished to inflict the same fate on others.
The Jaboticabal Poltergeist
In 1965, an 11-year-old girl named Maria Jose Ferreira was apparently haunted to death by a malevolent poltergeist.
Originally, the poltergeist seemed content to just smash up her house in Joboticabal, Brazil, but soon it seemed to take a personal vendetta against Maria herself. She was continually slapped and bitten, while he was often seen with bruises around her body. In one instance 55 needles had to be removed from one of her ankles, while the ghost would also try to suffocate her in the night with a cup.
It even followed her to school, with her clothes once spontaneously catching fire in the lunch room.
A psychic was called to examine her and he claimed Maria had in fact been a witch in a previous life. During her witchery she had killed a person, and now that person's ghost was haunting Maria in revenge.
The ghost claimed it would haunt Maria for the rest of her life. Unfortunately, that life was rather short. She poisoned herself when she was 16.
Nightmare Death Syndrome
The Nightmare Death Syndrome is a phenomenon which spread around Thailand in the 1990s. Apparently, the ghosts of highly sexualized women were returning and killing men in their sleep.
The apparitions, known as 'widow ghosts' became a national panic, and soon some men were taking to disguising themselves as women to escape the wrath of the poltergeists. However, there did seem to be some protection of these wraths. Penises.
Wooden carved penises were often worn around the necks of superstitious men in order to ward off the evil harpies. Indeed, communities would sometimes get involved in bizarre schlong-races, to see who could build the biggest and most decorative dong. In the end, hundreds of men would die.
Coincidentally, at the same time, autopsies revealed that many of the men who had died lived on a diet of nothing but sweet rice. This leads to an overproduction of insulin and other nutritional deficiencies, which when combined with stress, leads to death.
Sure. It is probably that which killed the men. But being murdered by a bunch of horny ghosts is more hardcore, right?