In honor of Black History Month
JOHN STEWART: He's one bad motha'f*cka!
"'Superhero History Time, what's that?" Well, Billy it's a little theme of mine I wanted to create for Moviepilot. Billy, I just want to teach nerds, comic book geeks, virgins or whatever the hell they call themselves nowadays. Hell, I'm twisting up my own damn words right now. Billy, please understand I'm not a great writer, hell I'm not even that good of a writer with my punctuation mistakes, but I can definitely make myself smile. "What does that have to do with Superhero History Time, Evan?" Goddammit Billy! Give me a break and let me explain!
The whole point is every week or two I will talk about superheroes and how badass they are. I'll probably tell people something new they never knew about their heroes. See Billy, having sex with a woman is a very special thing and when- Evan?" Oh, excuse me, I got off topic really fast, any-who just read the article and you too readers! Please like, comment and of course follow yours truly or I'll kill you..
LET US BEGIN!
The story begins with Hal Jordan the douche with the mask that everybody likes because writers always tell us he's the best but they never prove why he's the best besides fanboys always bringing him up during Parallax! So Hal Jordan was off to save the day when a school bus full of children is trapped at the edge of a collapsing bridge, with one little girl in grave danger on the edge of the broken pavement (idiot). Luckily, her teacher saved her ass- ":Ain't nobody got time for that!"
Then we find out that the teacher is Guy Gardner... Really, Guy? Mister Gardner suffered severe injuries from being run over by a bus! Plus, it didn't help that he was backup Green Lantern of sector 2814.
This is when the shizznit' goes down! We all know, well most of us should know that every GL has a backup Lantern incase he/she gets injured or incapacitated. The Guardians send Hal to Detroit, where he witnesses a dispute between a young man and a police officer. The Guardians tell Hal that the young man will become his new backup, but Hal, being the douche he is doesn't like the idea of a Lantern that back-sasses the law (hypocrite).
John Stewart is such a smooth, cool brotha that when Hal tells him he will pretty much be an intergalactic SUPER space cop! John replies "That's cool, baby!"
John is such a fast learner that he masters the power ring enough to stop the assassination of a presidential candidate for his first mission! Unfortunately, Hal doesn't like the way John handles the assignment (even though John successfully stopped the assassin). When things get tense, it's Hal, who makes the first move by grabbing John's shirt and accusing him of being a disgrace to the Green Lantern uniform. John slaps his hand away, and drops some knowledge on Hal, curtly telling him- “You’re gonna have your OWN lesson, teacher!”
Even in his very first mission, John Stewart proves every time that he has what it takes, standing up to the man who GAVE him his power ring rather than accept an injustice. In his career as alternate, John’s smarts and resourcefulness repeatedly came in handy, even when the primary Lantern falls short.
John wasn't called that much in his earlier years, but when he was, the man never failed in his duty. Even when the "great" Hal Jordan was incapacitated..... By slipping ass, naked on a bar of soap in the shower. LOL, really though?! Hahahaha! How-how does that happen?
Of course, things get a bit more complicated when it’s revealed that Hal’s mission isn’t a GL solo mission, but in fact an emergency call from the Justice League of America! Given their recent history at this point in time (The Joker is the only the biggest threat/name to have broken into their team fortress) the League is a bit stunned to find a different Green Lantern in their midst.
Now look at the third panel above, observe how John Stewart is confronted by Superman, Stewart doesn't even flInch, he pretty much tells the Last Son of Krypton to "chill out bro". This move by John takes nothing but pure confidence and balls of STEEL!
Do you get it? "Balls of Steel". Whatever, I tried.
The Leaguers end up butting heads with The Key, a villain who has booby-trapped an entire neighborhood to ruin Christmas and the team finds themselves too late to stop the bomb. Instead they quickly evacuate the area of civilians. While Superman and company handle that, John Stewart channels his architectural background into a little bit of urban renewal. Green Lantern, Christmas style!
Incredibly, he not only found a loophole in the Guardians operating procedures, he gains the respect of Green Arrow (Hal Jordan’s closest friend) and the Dark Knight himself! John maintains his role as a badass secondary superhero, but that doesn’t keep him from a life of his own, and even a little bit of *Ahem* female companionship...
SEXY TIME! (PANELS BELOW)
Billy: "He’s a complicated man, and no one understands him but his jewelry… I heard he’s one bad motha-"
Me: "SHUT YO MOUTH!"
Anyways, Billy is right, John was a complicated man, but damn the man is BLACK can a brother get some Advil up in here!
He even keeps his cool when people repeatedly maintain that he needs supervision, even though he learned to adjust to the power ring quicker than anyone else we’ve seen.
John's life changes completely once he moves to Coast City, California in order to take a job at Ferris Aircraft.
Just when you thought John moving to Coast City was the only big change. Nope! Mr. Attitude aka Hal Jordan is throwing a temper-tantrum when the Guardians constantly order him long-term exile's from Earth to cover other parts of his space sector. In conclusion Hal tells the "Blue Boys" to stick it up their stink machines!
Hal tries to return to a normal life at Ferris Aircraft as a test pilot and as boss, Carol Ferris' "boy-toy". When asked to find the most worthy man in the sector, the Guardians of the Universe didn’t even have to check their day-planner…Nope! It wasn't Hal they chose but *cough-cough* JOHN STEWART!
As the NEW MAIN Green Lantern of Earth he learns new tricks with his ring day-to-day while coming up with some brilliant ideas on the go! First, he has a bone to pick with the Guardians and this leads Stewart to an important chapter in his life.
Now that woman with the bright pink skin, she plays an important role in John's life, but I'll get back to her later. Stewart was the first Lantern publicly showing his secret identity and he wasn't a fan of wearing the mask, he believed it made you look weak, and by removing the mask it showed how fearless he is!
He ditches the mask for the second time in his career. John is the Earth’s resident Green Lantern when the greatest disaster in the history of their universe erupts all around them. This calls for a Lantern with GREAT will power and a team to match!
Putting this into context, The Monitor also chose the most powerful sorcerer in the history of history! Some of the most seasoned and powerful beings on all the multiple earths and the Earth-2 Superman (the ORIGINAL superhero). John stands alongside these mighty champions without a doubt or fear, even trying to suss out the secrets of the Monitor himself.
This panel is another perfect example of how calm and collective John is during high-stressful situations. As other heroes flip out, John keeps his composure.
During the Crisis, the Guardians of the Universe lose their COCONUTS, with their unified front fracturing for the first time in eons, and renegade Guardians empowering Guy Gardner (now suffering from psychological damage from his previous injuries) to act in their stead. Forced to face down his own predecessor, a man legendary for his willpower, John Stewart steps up to the metaphorical plate!
Me: "John whooped Gardner's ass-"
Billy: "So fast that his momma felt it!"
Me: "If you interrupt me again I'll kill you."
Like I said, he whooped his ass. The Crisis changed the boundaries of the universe, merged many Earths into one, blah-blah and shattered the Guardians beyond repair. They lift their restrictions and regulations, allowing the Green Lanterns to decide where they could patrol and live, leading John (alongside other Lanterns) to set up their own citadel on Earth as the NEW Green Lantern Corps!
Kilowog (the panel above of the pig looking dude) his face looks like mine when I cut the cheese that I've been holding in all day, that's right ladies soak it all in ;)
Most importantly for John, time spent with the new Corps means time spent with Katma Tui of Korugar, a relationship that quickly goes from colleagues to friends to more-than-friends and leads them to a whole new level of partnership. MORE SEXY TIME!
What makes John so mature and such a respectful, honest man is that he isn't fazed by his wife's purple-pinkish complexion or her being of a different species. At the end of the day he loves her for herself.
People should learn from this.
Fun Fact: John and Katma choose matching uniforms to show the strength of their unity. Their marriage is so strong, in fact, that it survives the very end of the Green Lantern Corps itself!
With many of the power rings destroyed the remaining Green Lanterns return to their normal lives. Such as John and Katma moving back to Detroit, and John returns to his career as an architect. Unfortunately, not all the Lanterns have any idea how to live a "normal life". Hmm, I wonder who that could be?
PUNK, HAL JORDAN!
John’s wedded bliss, having lasted for a couple of years (our time, which could be anywhere from 3 weeks to actually 2 years in their world!), ends abruptly as Carol Ferris, AGAIN possessed by the alien Star Sapphires, suddenly returns for bloody revenge on Green Lantern… ANY Green Lantern.
Before I explain this part this is my point why I think John has the richest storyline ever as a Green Lantern. He needs his own [Green Lantern](movie:593221) movie and to be in the [Justice League Part One](movie:401267) & Two. If Hollywood ever took notes about this drastic twist - Star Sapphire brutally murders Katma, leaving her dismembered body on their kitchen floor, for John to discover *throws-up while reading*. This leads John to be blinded by the horror of this tragic event. He goes off in utter RAGE!
Stewart is brought to trial for the murder of his wife (we all know he didn't commit). This leads Carol (Star Sapphire) to continue playing mind games with the emotional Lantern in court.
Star Sapphire uses her powers to frame John Stewart for HER OWN CRIME. Sending John Stewart on the run, fleeing the authorities to the African country of South Nambia where he is once again framed for a crime he did not commit. Hal is off to the rescue and find his best friend. Begging Stewart to accept the power ring and become a Green Lantern once again.
Understandably, John is very hesitant to take the ring back, yet he accepts the ring and calls himself a Green Lantern again.
Just as life itself was looking grim for John Stewart it was becoming darker and things were going to get a lot worse. That wave of darkness begins with a summons from the White House for John Stewart and the Justice League.
To be continued...