ByTommy DePaoli, writer at
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Tommy DePaoli

Oh boy. Or, in Anastasia Steele's timeless words, "Sweet mother of all...Jeez."

After seeing the fan art that featured Disney Princesses in scenes from [Fifty Shades of Grey](movie:391697), we learned that nothing is sacred when it comes to this phenomenon. Now, it seems that everyone's favorite animated cowboy is getting in on the action.

Some dirty scoundrel used his Woody doll to stage sex scenes that are DEFINITELY not appropriate for a kid's toy. Take a look at some of the Fifty Shades-inspired pictures below, but be warned, it's extremely likely you'll never be able to watch Toy Story again without getting traumatic flashbacks to this moment.

Wooden popsicle

I wonder if her inner goddess is doing the merengue with some salsa moves. Hey, don't look at me! That's a line from the book.

Don't break the chain, partner

Clearly Bo-Peep's shepherd's crook wasn't enough for this cowboy. Also, is anyone else most scarred by the fact that I can hear Tom Hanks' voice when I look at these?

Can't see the woody for the skeaze

Goddammit, Woody. Please get your paws off of Mami Tomoe, she's clearly not into you. Handsy dudes get punished.

Fish are paddles, not food

You know, it's refreshing to see a man in a submissive position for once, even if that man is a doll from a kid's movie who's getting spanked with a tuna.

There's a snake in Buzz's chute

Apparently, Woody doesn't discriminate when it comes to genders. He invited old pal Buzz over for a bout in his red room of pain, but they only made it as far as this white room of pleasure.

I'm a little surprised. I definitely would have begged Buzz for a top.

So, now when you see Fifty Shades of Grey this weekend, you can openly wonder with everyone else why Woody was never considered for the role of Christian Grey.

Has Toy Story officially been ruined for anyone else, or is every major movie bound to get the Fifty Shades treatment?


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