ByTommy DePaoli, writer at Creators.co
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Tommy DePaoli

The classic Nickelodeon show Clarissa Explains It All introduced many of us to preteen perils and the art of overthinking. Now, 24 years after the first episode premiered, creator Mitchell Kriegman has released details on the next journey for Clarissa.

A twenty-something Clarissa will appear in...

A BOOK! (hey, it's the next best thing)

Entertainment Weekly published this cover art from Things I Can't Explain, a Clarissa novel slated to come out in November, in addition to an interview with Kriegman. He offers early insights on a grown-up, present-day Clarissa who is a bit of a Luddite—she enjoys new technology, but she finds her true pleasures in old-fashioned items. Both Sam and Ferguson appear as well, but it doesn't sound like her parents have big parts.

Sadly, there are absolutely no plans to turn this book into a movie or TV show, which is just downright ludicrous. How is no one jumping on this property months before it's even released?

Well, I'm taking it upon myself to goad Clarissa in the right direction. If Things I Can't Explain does get picked up as a movie, here's who I would want to see take up the heavy thinker and her friends.

Clarissa Darling - Emma Stone

First of all, I need to point out that since the Clarissa in this story is in her mid-twenties, the original cast has aged out of eligibility. According to Kriegman, the matured Clarissa has "entered the world of new issues that are pretty unexplainable," and her future appears both "amazing and abysmal." Who better to struggle through the comic pitfalls of early adulthood than Emma Stone? Plus, she already bears a pretty surprising resemblance to Melissa Joan Hart in her earlier years, so I'm feeling like this needs to happen.

Sam Anders - Aaron Taylor-Johnson

Based on Kriegman's quick account, Sam and Clarissa are still friends, but he remains something of a mystery. There's a deeper analysis of him in the book, but one concrete thing we know is that he's old-fashioned when it comes to new tech. So...he's a hipster who uses a typewriter instead of buying a Chromebook. Aaron Taylor-Johnson has the kind of smoldering but approachable good looks that I hope Sam grew into. Obviously, he and Clarissa should be endgame, so it makes sense to cast someone as charming as him.

Ferguson Darling - Rupert Grint

The best news of to come out of the interview is that Ferg stars in a substantial arc, and "he's almost reborn in a way." That could mean so many things, but I'm imagining Ferguson coming out of his abrasively nerdy shell to become an appealing modern man. Aside from the obvious gingerness, Rupert Grint can handle the comedic, goofy scenes as well as the serious stuff (if Ferguson does in fact go in that direction).

Now scroll back up and look at this cast, and just imagine them with the humor from Clarissa Explains it All, updated for an older audience. Ideally, there will be a petition for such a movie before the book even comes out. Clarissa deserves it!

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