I'm ready! I'm ready! I'mmmmm readyyyy!
As a kid, I used to watch Spongebob Squarepants every night before bed. I dreamt about eating Krabby Patties (how did they make them look so delicious?) and going jellyfish hunting. I know what it feels like to be that fool who ripped "her" pants.
On a recent Reddit post, fans speculated how old Spongebob would be today. Of course, sponges do tend to age differently than humans (some in Antarctica are known to be 10,000 years old), but this post resulted in a few major theories.
Here are 2 of the best.
1.) Spongebob is Around 38 Years Old
According to Xarioes, Spongebob has a job and works full-time at the Krusty Krab. He is figured to be at least 18 years of age, since a full-time job is a pretty adult thing to have.
Spongebob also still talks to his parents (we should note that he does live on his own though), is consistently attempting to get his boat license, and rarely goes to school, so we can add a few years to the 18 and guess he is around 22-years-old.
If the show started in 1999, we add 22 + 16, which equals 38. This means he was born in 1977.
It scares me slightly that Spongebob is nearly 40, and I bet he still acts immature and still gets into ridiculous shenanigans with Patrick.
2) Back to the Future - Spongebob is 51 Years Old
Chandlerj33, on the other hand, mentions two important factors. In the first Spongebob film, it is noted that Spongebob has won 374 employee of the month awards, which would insinuate that he has worked at the Krusty Krab for 31 years.
In the "Extra Credit" episode, Spongebob's license states that he was born in 1986, which would mean that he is currently 29 years of age.
This would mean that the first Spongebob film takes place in the future if he had been working there for so long. If we estimate that Spongebob was 20 when he first started working at the Krusty Krab, and added the 31 years of him working there, Spongebob would have been 51 in the first Spongebob film.
According to this theory, Spongebob is a whole 10 years older than we thought. And that scares me even more. I would have hoped that he would have a wife, some kids, and was getting along with retirement soon. Ditching Patrick as a friend would have been a good idea as well.
Perhaps we'll never know exactly how old Spongebob is. But who really wants to get into the true semantics of things?