Oh my god January is almost over...thank the fucking lord, but first I have to review this peace of cinematic trash With Johnny Depp in it, oh boy.
The story to Mortdecai is about the British Mi5, his impossibly leggy wife and an international terrorist, debonair art dealer and part time rogue Charlie Mortdecai (Johnny Depp) must traverse the globe armed only with his good looks and special charm in a race to recover a stolen painting rumored to contain the code to a lost bank account filled with Nazi gold.
Oh Depp why do you keep doing this? you had it all man. The money, the love from the fans, the Oscar nominations and your spot light. Now look at you. Flop after flop at the box office, very low rating on Rotten Tomatoes and me slowly losing faith in you, and this movie is the extra nail to the coffin of Depp's career because this is by far the worst movie of 2015.
Johnny Depp in this movie was pretty much playing Captain Jack sparrow..again. Nothing much to say about his performance because he's just doing the same performance over and over again. Probably his next movie I bet I'm going to say the same thing that his just doing Jack Sparrow again. Sorry Johnny but you really need to get out of that role of a gay pirate.
David Koepp is the directed of this movie but he's better known for his screenwriting for such films has: Jurassic Park, Spider-man, Panic Room and Mission Impossible. But has a directed he's...okay, not bad, but not amazing, his writing in some films can come off not so good as well. Now he directs Mortdecai and it's painful to say that the directing in this was pretty piss poor terrible and it's like he wasn't even trying in this, but everyone in this movie seems like they do not give a bull about. No wonder it floped hard at the box office.
I hear a lot of critics and people even on YouTube saying that the movie has some little chuckles in it, but that didn't happen here with me. I was in complete silent bored out of my mind of this dreadfully bland, hollow of a movie. From start til finish I felt embarrassed watching this movie, I really was.
I'm sorry but I couldn't find a thing I liked in this movie, not even Gwyneth Paltrow or Ewan McGregor couldn't save this movie from being even close to being alright.
Mortdecai should be best descried has a embarrassment of movies. This movie is worthy of a Razzie Award, and to the people who disagree with me or think this movie isn't all that bad has I'm putting it out then god I wish I was you right now.