I am writing a thing. and this thing is about another thing someone else wrote. "What was that thing?" I hear you ask, whilst you read this comfortably in your bed, or on your sofa. Perhaps you are on a bus, and reading this on your phone. How amazing is technology, that you can read my nonsense even as you go about your daily business. I hope that daily business is something fun by the way, and you're not on your way to work. If you are, I feel your pain.
Anyway, five an a half lines in and I have already digressed from the point of this article. Back on track folks, and don't you distract me again.
Recently, I was scrolling through Facebook, as I sometimes do whilst I drop the kids off at the pool (That means poo) when I came across an Opinion with which I......not disagreed with per-se, More thought was completely moronic, and reductive. I remember the comment exactly, and I will repeat it here, before I, step by methodical step, Rip it to pieces. I say step by step, I don't think it will take me that long to do it. It went like this:
"So Age of Ultron has Iron Man, Hulk, Captain America, Thor, Black Widow, Hawkeye, Vision, Scarlett Witch, And Quicksilver. And yet Batman VS Superman has too many characters?"
Friends, I read that comment, and the first thing I thought went thus; "Is this guy a Moron?"
First of all, Are we forgetting the 8 Movies that came before this? (I am, of course not counting the Avengers here) The whole point of The incredible Hulk, Iron man 1-3 Thor 1&2 and Captain America 1&2 was to create a foundation for the Avengers. So that these characters could be chucked together without having to worry about any one character not getting the level of attention he deserves. Avengers has finished. Did we get enough back story from Captain America? nope, but that's cool the first Avengers has got you covered Bro. Didn't get enough of Hulk? Here Amigo, watch this *Throws copy of Incredible Hulk in ever such a cool manner.*
The point being of course, that we don't need back story, we aren't going into Avengers thinking "I want to see lots of Iron Man" and then getting disappointed when Thor is the centre of attention. Because we know this is a team up movie, with pre established Characters, who mould together to form a whole, and when we sit down to watch Age of Ultron, we will be there for an amazing story Featuring Heroes we love to varying degrees, But in a large way, the story is what will attract us. We can accept them as indivisual pieces in a large, because of all the work that has gone into it before hand.
Now take Batman Vs Superman. Which has Superman, Batman, Wonderwoman, Cyborg, and Aquaman in the line up. How many movies have preceded this? one. Yep, One Average/good Movie (depending on who you ask) NO characters other than Superman have been established. Not one. We saw a Wale that may or have been sent by Aquaman, but that hardly counts.
To iterate the point I am going to (try to) make I will use myself as an example. As with Most casual DC fans, I love Batman, Tolerate Superman, Don't get the fuss with Wonder-woman, and see Aquaman as that guy they take the piss out of on Family guy. I will go into Batman Vs Superman, Wanting only to see Batman, and his fight with Superman. But getting past my fascination with this new batman, I also want to see where Wonder Woman comes from, But I don't just want an origin story, I wont to Love Cyborg. I want to feel his pain when he gets his arse kicked, as he inevitably will do at some point. Think about this even if the movie runs for three hours, with Bats, Supes, WW and Cyborg that is four characters, Three of which we so far have no backstory on. If we allow for 1 and half hours of backstory/where is Superman now, That leaves 1.5 hours. In that time we need to get enough information on Bruce to be able to understand his reasons for battling Superman, lets say this takes 30 minutes, including an introduction to Alfred. that is 2 hours of the three hour run time gone. And Batman hasn't even fought Superman yet, we haven't seen Lex, Or understood HIS reasons for wanting to hunt Supes. Honestly, Is that enough time for these characters? Will that be able to do the Characters you love Justice? (Pun absolutely intended)
I know that this isn't how movies work, I know that a clever writer can work out a way to use this run time to its fullest, But honestly. It just isn't enough. We needed a Wonder Woman Movie first, we needed A Batman movie first. Maybe not a Cyborg movie. He is a bit shit.
Just some musings of mine.
Still excited to see Dawn of Justice though