ByMatthew Rowe, writer at
Writer, fanatic of girls with superpowers and thinking about stuffs
Matthew Rowe

Let's get something straight before we get to my main point. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 is going to be as much of a train wreck and a steaming turd on the chest of the original material as the first film was, and we all knew that before this article, but I saw something recently that confirmed what were strongly seated suspicions.

First, let's look at those obvious reasons before checking the proof I recently uncovered:

Michael Bay is still involved - The only good thing Michael Bay has ever done is 'Bad Boys' and that only worked because Will Smith and Martin Lawrence were a driving force. 'Transformers' series was a mess, the first film was a mess, the sequel will be a mess.

Turtles on Steroids - The turtles still have those stupid, obscenely muscled up designs. I could write a whole article on that alone, but let's just focus on a comment from the first movie. It was said that the mutant turtles were 180 cm. I am 180 cm. There's no way that someone of my height could have that much body mass and not look like an oversized dwarf. The turtles still looked tall - design and continuity fail.

Michaelangelo wants your sympathy!
Michaelangelo wants your sympathy!

Megan Fox is April - Is it a stretch to say Megan Fox was actually the one who presented the most acting chops in the first film? I've always disliked her because she is the Johnny Depp to Michael Bay's Tim Burton-ism, however, having sat through the first film, I realised that hanging around with that douche is possibly her only flaw. She's nothing special, possibly a nice person, but unfortunately, April O'Neill she is not. April is a redheaded, every-girl. Megan Fox is not.

I feel like I am just scratching the barrel but that's the only evidence I can give without talking specifically about the first film. So, let's move on to the recent evidence I saw:

Casey Jones' Mask

Here's Ollie!... I mean, Casey!
Here's Ollie!... I mean, Casey!

Casey is supposed to be a vigilante who uses sports gear as his weapons, and defence; the hockey mask is there to protect his face and his identity. Look at the picture again. Does that look like a hockey mask to you? Nope. It's some kind of custom movie-only job. Which means, like the jacked up turtles themselves, Bay has gone for style - very terrible style - over substance. He's again ignoring the source material to tell his own macho fantasy version of the franchise, not caring that he is simultaneously crapping over a lot of childhoods.

Plus, Casey has short hair. Plus he looks too clean cut. Plus he's played by The Arrow!! How is he going to pull of being Casey Jones without being Oliver Queen too?

This project has too many nails in the coffin for my liking already.


What's your thoughts? Will TMNT 2 redeem Michael Bay?


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