ByRomulo Vital, writer at

I love disney movies, that explains why i have always been a awkward kid... just kidding. (no i'm not O.o)

So let's see what these movies have taught me (attencion this is not an offence to anyone, just to make sad people have a happier day by smiling):

The Little Mermaid

This is what i learned:

1. They like their feet.

2. They brush their hairs... diferently

3. I MUST not have an affair, or she will call her friends. And they will kick my butt.

4. I must make a statue of myself and throw it at the sea, so she can be obsessed with me.

5.They don't eat crab.

5.1. They have weird ways to seduce guys.

Snow White

1. I can go get my diamonds while cleans and sleeps.

2. I can live with all my mates and she doesn't mind

3. The problem with that she sleeps in their beds too.

4. I can't let her eat apples, because she's allergic.

5. And i know that if i take her to the doctor after she eats that apple she'll fall in love with the doctor.


1. I must exercise because in my village their all muscled. The fat man come later.

2.Women are really beautiful...

... and really crazy.

3. Women sing and dance with the wind, as soon as they met a man.

4. They are great friends...

5. They have weird pets.

Finding Nemo

1. Women are really scary.

1.5. They really do have weird pets.

2. They have terrible memory.

3.They try to motivate us, even though it might be annoying.

4. They speak weird languages.

5. They give great hugs.


1. Women don't like that men sneak inside their skirts.

2. They have terrible balance.

3. It makes them uncomfortable to have wild men hearing their hearts. (But they don't stop them)

4. Their hands are perfect matches with ours.

5. They are shy with shirtless, long haired, muscled, real close to their faces man.


1. I can't die or my wife will be mean to my daughter. (better yet, why would i marry that?)

2. If i ever see a girl loosing who just danced with me, loosing her shoe, i must search the hole country/kingdom to find her foot. (Let's hope the foot is worth the shoe)

3. Fairy godmother's exist and they say weird things!!

4. Women look beautiful in dresses.

5. They talk to birds

Sleeping Beauty

1.Women also talk to rabits.

2. They literally fall in the arms of their loved man.

3. Some smell really bad, look at all that green around her.

4.They like to touch sharp things (that must smell real bad aswell)

5. They dance with fairies.

Beauty and the Beast

1.Women that are beautiful are called Beauty.

2. They are willing to sacrifice themselfs for their nerd father.

3. They like beasts. (this one is not that bad, right?)

4.Random objects have life.

5. Their kisses are magical.

Well there's no time for more.. well acctually there is, but this is long enough, right? Right?


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