ByKaitlin Parker, writer at
Humble coffee freak. Passionate zombie enthusiast. Wine scholar.
Kaitlin Parker

1. The Killer is always behind you.

So, pretty much the killer is always behind a person while they are standing near a window, door, the place is completely silent and you always least expect it. It's gotten to a point where it happens so much that it is extremely expected and I do not jump.

2. The Plots Suck Arse.

As an example, The Pyramid. Seriously? Like who thought this movie would be somewhat scary? I sat there the whole time just staring at the screen with confusion because it was so damn ridiculous or because the killers in the movie were just so damn stupid. I would put Sharknado in this category but I still do not know to this day if it was a serious horror film or a comedy horror film.

3. They Really Need To Learn That Sounds Are Shit.

Okay, so all these new paranormal movies about ghosts and demons just suck arse in general. Nothing jumps out and scares me. They try their hardest to add stupid arse noises thinking that "this will scare the audience". It does scare a few people but not the people that expect it to happen.

So in general, I expect everything in horror movies these days. Nothing scares me really. Everything is so cliché. But you know what? I do believe that these are the reasons I love horrors.

And these are the reasons why I do not like Gremlins. That movie. Scared me as a child and still scares me to this day. PG MY ARSE. My parents didn't help me while watching it. I will never watch that movie for the 3rd time. Ever.


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