ByJames Buxton, writer at
Professional Nerf Herder. Twitter: @JayDBux
James Buxton

Suicide Squad has always consisted of the nastiest, dodgiest characters created by DC. Whether we're talking the psychotic Joker or the brutally efficient killing machine, Deathstroke, you need to have done something pretty bad to get onto that membership list.

And while today's comic book heroes and villains will be forever remembered for their plots and deeds, many often forget that they aren't the first of their kind. The gods and monsters of Ancient Greece, considered by some to be the first appearance of superhero-like characters, have certainly had their fair share of battles and missions rivaling those of today's comic book characters. While the heroes such as Hercules, Theseus and Perseus still remain well known in this day and age, it's often the villains of each story that seem to get brushed under the rug and forgotten.

And so I thought, what's the best way to bring a handful of these characters back into the limelight and still stay relevant? Of course! What if Suicide Squad had existed during the days of Ancient Greece?

Now that would be a history lesson I'd enjoy.

The Muscle - Atlas

And somehow, he still manages to fit in leg day.
And somehow, he still manages to fit in leg day.

Atlas is one of the better known bad guys in Greek mythology. He was one of the titans, the all-powerful beings that preceded the Olympian gods. During the war between the two, Atlas sided against the gods and was defeated alongside his siblings. As punishment, most titans were banished to the pit of Tartarus, the inescapable equivalent of Arkham Asylum, but Zeus recognised Atlas' strength and instead condemned him to an eternity of holding up the Earth on his shoulders.

There are no other contenders for Atlas' spot on this list. I mean, he holds up the whole freaking planet all day every day! He's certainly no hero either, as he tricked everyone's favorite demigod Heracles (or Hercules) into doing his job for him. Luckily, Heracles tricked him back by making Atlas take it back while he rearranged his cloak. Atlas certainly isn't the sharpest tool in the shed, and couldn't hold the team by himself, which is where our next member comes in...

The Brains - Daedalus

Here comes the sun...
Here comes the sun...

When you think of iconic Ancient Greek villains, Daedalus probably doesn't come to mind. He's probably most well known for being the architect that designed the labyrinth that housed to minotaur and the inventor that created wings to escape imprisonment. Sadly, that second one didn't go so well. While the wings worked at first, allowing Daedalus and his son Icarus to fly away, he had not anticipated the wax he used melting when his son flew too close to the sun. Icarus' wings fell and he was killed as he hit the ground, leaving Daedalus grief-stricken for the rest of his days.

Daedalus is rarely painted as a villain, however that doesn't mean he's a hero. In his later years, he grew so proud of his own inventions that he couldn't stand the thought of someone being better than him. When his own nephew, a young boy named Perdix, began showing potential, Daedalus had him killed by throwing him from the top of the acropolis. Yeah, not a nice guy.

But despite his flaws, Daedalus is possibly the smartest mortal character around when it comes to Greek mythology. I mean, his name became synonymous with being an inventor and the story of his labyrinth has become one of the most well known tales of all time. He's rightly earned his spot on my Ancient Greek Suicide Squad.

The Wild Card - Hades

Okay, now before all you Ancient Greek scholars politely remind me that Hades was not in fact a villain and was just misunderstood, let me tell you that I am fully aware that Hades was not evil.

What you can't deny though, is that by-and-large, Hades was cruel, stern and merciless when it came to dishing out judgment. He was hated by many and the Ancient Greeks themselves would often refrain from saying his name. He also abducted the goddess Persephone and made her his wife.

So yeah, not evil. Just a massive asshole.

Hades was cunning and calculating. Much like in the Disney film, he resented the Olympians for banishing him to the underworld and used to sulk a lot, but at the same time he was always a keen ally. He proved himself during the war between the gods and the titans, ruthlessly cutting down anyone in his way.

Even in the Ancient myths, Hades was a mixed bag. No one could predict what his next move would be and no one ever got in his way. He was also rich, seeing as he owned all the minerals buried underground, making him a key member in the trials soon facing this godlike Suicide Squad.

The Leader - Hera

You have no idea how rare a non-naked picture is
You have no idea how rare a non-naked picture is

There's always been some debate as to who the greatest villain in Greek Mythology is. Some say it's Gaia, the Earth crushing mother of titans. Others say Typhon, the most dangerous threat ever faced by the Olympians. To me, it has always been Zeus' wife, Hera.

While on the outside, she may seem like an all loving deity of women and marriage, but on the inside, Hera is a deceiving, hateful goddess with a number of atrocious deeds to her name.

To name a just a few, Hera has an instant hatred of any of Zeus' children that are not her own. Whenever she discovers that another woman is pregnant with her husband's child, she goes out of her way to prevent that child from being born. When Leto became pregnant, she banned Leto from giving birth on Earth in any way. She even went to the extent of kidnapping the goddess of childbirth to prevent Leto from going into labor.

She's been a constant enemy of Heracles, having sent two serpents to kill him when he was just a baby. If that doesn't convince you she's a monster then I don't know what will. Even though Hercules killed the serpents with ease, Hera remained a constant hell raiser in Hercules' life, determined to make him as miserable as possible.

But it wasn't just Zeus' illegitimate children she detested. Hera threw her own son, Hephaestus, from the top of Mount Olympus, crippling him, purely because he was ugly. Not only was Hera undoubtedly evil, she was also shallow.

And, as Queen of Olympus, she was also incredibly powerful. She sat beside him atop Olympus and was descended from the greatest titan of all, Cronus. She was also Zeus' sister but the less you read into that the better.

Looks like it's time for a lineup change.
Looks like it's time for a lineup change.

While I can't imagine anything along these lines will be gracing our screens any time soon, it's always fun to speculate what something like this could be like.

Who's your favorite Ancient Greek god?


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