BLADES OF GLORY. 2007. DIRECTED BY WILL SPECK AND JOSH GORDON. STARRING WILL FERRELL, JON HEDER, AMY POEHLER, WILL ARNETT AND CRAIG T. NELSON. REVIEW BY SANDRA HARRIS. ©
This film is bloody hilarious. There’s hardly a moment in it when you’re not laughing your butt off at the sheer comic genius portrayed throughout. It’s brilliantly written, directed and acted and the on-screen partnership of Ferrell and Heder is pure (Napoleon) Dynamite. See what I did there…? Snigger.
Chazz Michael Michaels (Ferrell) and Jimmy McElroy (Heder) are two ice-skating stars/rivals who earn themselves a lifetime ban from skating after they engage in fisticuffs during an awards ceremony. After reaching rock-bottom, the hopeless pair decide to team up to start entering skating competitions as a couple. After all, their lifetime ban was only in their own division (mens’ skating), right…?
With the help of their skating coach, played by the original COACH, Craig T. Nelson (that’s handy, isn’t it?), they manage to reach the finals of the World Wintersports Games in Montreal, squabbling like two-year-olds and bitching and griping at each other every step of the way.
There’s a wee bit of an of obstacle to the pair’s grab for glory, however. Two obstacles, to be precise. Brother-and-sister skating duo Stranz and Fairchild Von Waldenberg- yes, those are truly dreadful names- are the only other skaters good enough to pose a threat to Chazz and Jimmy. Plus, they play incredibly dirty, and they’ll stop at nothing to win the gold medal. Add to this the fact that Jimmy has a sweet little crush on their sister Katie and you’ve got yourself one dilly of a pickle, as Ned Flanders might say…
There are so many moments of solid-gold comedy brilliance in the film. Chazz’s ridiculous über-manliness and sweaty-balled, in-your-face, testosterone-fuelled perpetual horniness, for one thing. He’s a fully-paid up sex addict, after all. By contrast, Jimmy’s virginal, pastel-sweater-wearing smiley sweetness. Their hilarious tight skating outfits and the way they are forced to keep touching each other’s genitals during their routines.
Then there’s their attempts to nail the Iron Lotus, the most difficult skating feat ever attempted and one that normally results in decapitation. Chazz’s doomed-to-failure attempts to turn Jimmy into a sex machine. Jimmy’s nutty stalker and his glory-obsessed adoptive father, who ‘un-adopts’ him after he gets his lifetime ban and leaves him by the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. In the winter. With only his teddy bear for company. The dirty rotten meanie…!
Their skating routines are fantastic fun to watch. The blossoming friendship between the mismatched pair would warm the cockles of even the coldest heart. If you’re looking for a film that makes you cry with laughter at its witty, bitchy dialogue and afterwards leaves you with a lovely warm glow in your insides that’s as comforting as an open fire on a winter’s day, then look no further. This is that film. Plus, there are plenty of opportunities to drool over Will Ferrell’s manly bare chest. Even without the laughs, that would definitely clinch it for me every time.
AUTHOR BIOGRAPHY OF SANDRA HARRIS.
Sandra Harris is a Dublin-based performance poet, novelist, film blogger, sex blogger and short story writer. She has given more than 200 performances of her comedy sex-and-relationship poems in different venues around Dublin, including The Irish Writers’ Centre, The International Bar, Toners’ Pub (Ireland’s Most Literary Pub), the Ha’penny Inn, Le Dernier Paradis at the Trinity Inn and The Strokestown Poetry Festival.
Her articles, short stories and poems have appeared in The Metro-Herald newspaper, Ireland’s Big Issues magazine, The Irish Daily Star, The Irish Daily Sun and The Boyne Berries literary journal. In August 2014, she won the ONE LOVELY BLOG award for her (lovely!) horror film review blog. She is addicted to buying books and has been known to bring home rain-washed tomes she finds on the street and give them a home.
She is the proud possessor of a pair of unfeasibly large bosoms. They have given her- and the people around her- infinite pleasure over the years. She adores the horror genre in all its forms and will swap you anything you like for Hammer Horror or JAWS memorabilia. She would also be a great person to chat to about the differences between the Director’s Cut and the Theatrical Cut of The Wicker Man. You can contact her at:
1) ‘… BY A WOMAN WALKING HER DOG…’
2) A WRITER’S JOURNEY
3) ANNA MEETS COUNT DRACULA
4) ANOTHER FIFTY REALLY RANDOM HORROR FILM REVIEWS TO DIE FOR…
5) CANCER BALLS
6) CATCH OF THE DAY
7) FIFTY FILTHY-DIRTY SEX-POEMS YOU MUST READ BEFORE I DIE.
8) FIFTY REALLY RANDOM HORROR FILM REVIEWS TO DIE FOR…
9) THE DEVIANTS
10) VISITING DAY