Sonny, true love is the greatest thing, in the world - except for a nice MLT – mutton, lettuce and tomato sandwich, where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomato is ripe. They’re so perky, I love that. - Miracle Max
The Princess Bride is the greatest love story ever made. It's eternally quotable, outrageously hilarious, and perfectly romantic. It has a stellar cast and perfect characters. There is simply no better film about love than The Princess Bride.
So, what would happen if the movie was remade? Who would the cast be? These are two of the most ridiculous questions ever asked in the history of mankind. The Princess Bride shall never be remade! It was perfect then, it is perfect now, and it will forever be perfect - for all of time.
But since this is a fan cast, I've done my very best at recasting some of the major characters in classic tale. I've tried to make spot-on casting choices that portray the same level of talent and devotion that the original cast glowed with. Are you ready to begin this tale of storybook love? Grab your horse and ride off on an adventure, a quest for finding love is about to undergo!
Westley - Douglas Booth
There's not many people who could play Westley to the level that Cary Elwes carried. That's why Douglas Booth is one of the best picks out there. He could play the ever-loyal and witty Westley like a boss. Plus, he generally would be able to work well with my next casting choice, Emma Watson.
Princess Buttercup - Emma Watson
Emma Watson is a princess already, so she's a clear winner for the spot of the beautiful and tough Princess Buttercup. She'd easily be able to put up a fight when she needed to, all while also being able to be the romantic, dreamy Princess Buttercup when Westley is around.
Inigo Montoya - Antonio Banderas
There is no better choice for Inigo Montoya than Antonio Banderas. He's got the hilarious antics, the Inigo Montoya looks, and the chops to play an action hero. I can already see him facing Count Rugen and saying, "You killed my father. Prepare to die!"
Vizzini - Paul Giamatti
There's no actor who could play Vizzini better than Paul Giamatti. He could play the hilarious Sicilian with ease. He'd have the perfect aurora of stupidity, yet hilarious arrogance. I'm envisioning his conversation with Westley and it's making me laugh. He'd be the best thing that happened to this movie!
Fezzik - Paul White
Fezzik is a really hard character to cast, and that's because Andre the Giant played Fezzik extremely well. There's not too many big guys out there in the acting career, either. However, Paul White could play Fezzik sufficiently for the role of Fezzik. He's goofy and big, so he could play a big, dumb, giant pretty well.
The King - Bill Murray
I deeply considered casting Bill Murray as Miracle Max, but in the end, Bill Murray would be a spot-on choice for the King. He's goofy, old, and could easily play a somewhat delirious old man. Plus, it's only logical that he'd raise someone like Prince Humperdinck.
Prince Humperdinck - Steve Buscemi
I never considered Prince Humperdinck that handsome of a prince. He's got such a bad attitude and it's pretty much antagonistic in every way. And yet, he's still kind of goofy. Steve Buscemi would play the character like a boss. He has the villainous look to him and he's a stunning actor.
Count Tyrone Rugen - Gary Oldman
Like most of these characters, Count Tyrone Rugen was a challenge to cast. However, I've decided Gary Oldman could play a pretty amazing Count Tyrone Rugen. He could have that evil six fingered hand. He'd have an ounce of mercy in his blood, but in the end, he'd play the perfect evil sidekick to Prince Humperdinck.
Miracle Max - Steve Carell
Whenever I watch Miracle Max in The Princess Bride, I'm never creeped out. In fact, I'm usually laughing hysterically. He and his wife are a hoot! Steve Carell can be one of the funniest actors sometimes. Give him some old age looks and he'd be the funniest Miracle Max ever! Plus, he's pretty crazy like Miracle Max.
Valerie - Meryl Streep
Meryl Streep is an all-around great actress. Her portrayal of an old witch in Into The Woods was exceptional. I can only imagine how great she'd be at playing the part of Valerie - Miracle Max's crazy wife who chases him around. Together, she and Steve Carell could be the greatest elderly couple onscreen in a long time!
The Albino - Seth Rogan
I laugh every time I see the Albino. He's so dumb and weird and hilariously evil. Seth Rogen is a perfect pick to play him. Give him a lot of makeup and he's ready to go!
The Grandfather - Michael Caine
If somebody asked me to think of a person in the entertainment business who reminded me of a grandfather, I'd immediately think of Michael Caine. It doesn't matter if it's in Inception, or Batman, or even in Interstellar; Michael Caine is the perfect, loving grandfather who's not afraid to put in a few words.
The Grandson - Logan Lindholm
This was probably the hardest casting choice to ever make - this is also why I'm even more in awe of The Princess Bride's choice for the little boy. Any little boy could probably do, but Logan Lindholm seems to have a start at an exceptional career. He's really cute, awesome, and funny. Chances are, he'd play a great grandson to Michael Caine's grandfather.
Well, how do you feel? Do you have mixed emotions? I'm still convinced The Princess Bride can never be rebooted, but if it did, these actors and actresses would be my number one choices. Let me know what you guys think below!