ByMatt Lee, writer at

Alright, now we all have probably seen Avengers: Age of Ultron by now, right?

And I know that we all left the theaters thinking, "Gee whiz, when will Marvel finally get their act together and cast the right actors for the right roles??"

Gosh darn, Peppermint Scoobysnacks is Dr. Strange?
Gosh darn, Peppermint Scoobysnacks is Dr. Strange?

Well, you can all rest assured that the minds over here at MLee Inc. have put the best minds available on the subject.

Top men, reader. Top. Men.
Top men, reader. Top. Men.

Well fear, stress, and angrily comment no more! We now present to you, the perfect cast for this Avengers movie and all future installations in the franchise!

So without further formalities, we present to you, the all new cast of Avengers: Age of Ultron!

Thank you, thank you.
Thank you, thank you.

Tony Stark/Iron Man: Christopher Walken

Steve Rogers/Captain America: Adam Sandler

Bruce Banner/The Incredible Hulk: Chris Rock

Thor Odinson: Tommy Wisseu

Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow: Jack Black (Jack Black Widow anyone??)

Clint Barton/Hawkeye: Talons the Hawk

Wanda Maximoff/Scarlett Witch: Will Smith

Pietro Maximoff/Quicksilver: Eddie Murphy

The Vision/J.A.R.VI.S: Jaden Smith

Nick Fury: Kevin James (In character as Paul Blart)

Ultron: Rob Schneider

Col. James Rhodes/Iron Patriot: Arnold Schwarzenegger

Sam Wilson/The Falcon: Ice Cube

Maria Hill: Ice T.

Now, aside from this stunning main cast, the film will also feature Vanilla Ice as Dr.Helen Cho, Sylvester Stallone as Laura Barton, Ben Stiller as Ulysses Klau, and Jon Lovitz as the voice of Laura and Clint's half hawk/half human children.

The film will also include guest appearances by Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson as Heimdall, Nicolas Cage as Dr. Erik Selvig, Ray Romano as Peggy Carter, and Shaquille O'Neil as Thanos.

Now I know most of you are reacting like the image below right now:

Jadan AND Will Smith? Sign me up!
Jadan AND Will Smith? Sign me up!

But please, hold your applause and dry those tears because you definitely are going to need those tissues for when the actual movie comes out. This emotional roller coaster will be sure to have you all in tears by the end, because come Summer 2014, nothing will be the same. So, we here at MLee Inc. wish you a happy day, and remind you to please, give us your money.


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