So we've all seen The Expendables 1:
and hope to see number 4 someday:
And we'll continue to see them until they hit number 30, right?
Now, they're making an all-female Expendabelles, as you're well aware-
Moviepilot even ranted about it!
Those movies cover all the past, present and future buff (or used to be) actors and actresses. Great! But what about the other guys? You know who I'm talkin' about. The slightly chubby, or very chubby, not-so-good-looking folks?
Some of the not-so-perfect-bod elite of hollywood have been sort-of action stars, but most of them will never hold a machine gun and scream at an alien.
SO LET'S GIVE THEM A SHOT!
Here's my dream cast for...
John Goodman as the head badass
You can NOT have a big guy action movie with out him!
He's been a boxer and a mall cop twice, so he knows some ins and outs of busting the baddies and busting a face.
Gabrielle Not-As-Puffy-Anymore Iglesias
We GOTTA have some comic relief!
She tore it up in Misery! Why not here?
I have no clue if she's even chunky this week, but hey, by the end of the movie, she could be!
Nacho? Nacho average Libre!!!
He could be the used-to-be-a-stud-but-now-he's-a-spud dude
Most definitely our Dolph Lundgren. He was a guaranteed hit back in his hayday, but now, he's doing weird Aikido demonstrations on Youtube:
Drinkin at the bar all day, kickin butt and takin names all night!
Every seen Beverly Hills Ninja? Ignore the fact that he's dead, and imagine the possibilities with all this cool digital stuff we can do these days. He could help the team by being their guide from the otherworld, or whatever.
Larry the Cable Guy
How else are they gonna GIT ER DONNNNE?
From Newman to that jerk that set all the dinosaurs free in Jurassic Park, he would be perfect as the team's nemesis!
She's losin the pounds pretty good, but she would be a nice feminine touch to the team. Even though she could probably out-belch and out-fart any of the fellas!
Who do you think would make a good Expandedables cast? Comment below!