ByJack Roberts, writer at
Jack Roberts

So The Apocalypse is finally upon us and we are all woefully unprepared but luckily we have all compiled our fantasy survival teams a thousand times with our friends so this should not be hard to handle, obviously providing we can find the people within our Apocalypse Survival Team. My team looks like this.

1. Bear Grylls

Name: Edward Michael "Bear" Grylls

Occupation: Adventurer/ Survival Expert

Reason for choice:

Bear Grylls is one of the worlds foremost survival expert, every episode of his tv series' Man vs. Wild has Grylls placed into an environment that no human being has any business surviving in. Bear Grylls could bring a lot to any apocalypse survival team, he could show the team how to get water in desert lands, he could show the team which food will kill them and which will sustain them, if our team was set upon by a group of animals Grylls would be the perfect man to assess the situation and act for the good of the teams survival. Bear Grylls is willing to do anything to survive including eating a snake and then urinating in it and wearing it as a scarf to insulate his neck from desert heat and giving himself an enema to keep himself hydrated.

2. Agent 47

Name: 47

Occupation: Hitman

Reason for choice:

With Bear Grylls showing my team how not to kill themselves or die naturally the team will now need some protection from the other, more human, threats. Apocalyptic wastelands are very dangerous places and are crawling with gangs of bandits, scavengers, (depending on the type of apocalyse) zombies and a whole host of other people out to kill/rob/eat people, Agent 47 is one of the video games greatest killers and could easily dispatch these problems without even having to get blood on his suit (probably). 47's enhanced DNA and intensive training have made him also impervious to fear, enabling him to remain perfectly calm in virtually any situation, skills that would very helpful when the team is in danger.

3. Lego Batman

Name: Batman/ Bruce Wayne

Occupation: Master Builder

Reason for choice:

With the team having it's scavenger/ survival expert and it's protector from physical threats, it now needs someone to build it's base of operations, who better for the job than everyone's favourite master builder Lego Batman. Batman could create a base for the team, in even the most sparse environments. Batman is also (like Bear Grylls) willing to do the unthinkable to survive, just in a very different way, Batman will literally fly into the sun to survive and to 'look really cool'. Lego Batman is also adept at working in rag tag groups (see Lego Movie) and therefore would be unfazed by the bizarre group. Aside from creating the base Batman would also act as comic relief, lightening the mood and keeping group morale high in even the darkest of times (which ironically is probably were he'd be funniest).

So there you have it that is my team to survive thrive and probably even have some laughs in the apocalypse but how do you think I did...


How did I do?


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