BySafe Hans, writer at
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Safe Hans

1. Ben Affleck is Batman

Ben Affleck has already proven he has the chops to play a dark, brooding super hero in the 2003 smash hit "Daredevil" . Although some may argue his role as the titular character was surpassed by Collin Farrel's Oscar worthy performance as Dare Devils arch nemesis , the marksman Bullseye , Affleck still gave a resounding performance as both Daredevil and his alter ego Matt Murdock, showing the range to play both a Lawyer who is basically a human lie detector but is still too incompetent to win any cases and the blind vigilante he becomes to mercilessly beat the ever loving crap out of those he was too incompetent to put away trough the legal system in the first place , with all the style and grace you'd expect of a legally blind man in a red leather body suit . Having already nailed this role i'm "Super" excited to see how Ben fills the boots of The Caped Crusader and playboy billionaire Bruce Wayne , the guy is already super fucking rich so he can clearly draw on that for one half of the role and bats are blind right? I rest my case .

2. Christian Bale is not Batman

This is pretty much self explanatory , face it people the guy just plain sucked as Batman . He sounded like he had laryngitis every single time he donned the damn cowl and you thought Bane was hard to understand ? I couldn't make out a word that came out of that mother fuckers mouth , he sounded like he was choking on every syllable . Oh and those who use the excuse he was disguising his voice , uh hello , if Superman only needs to put on a pair of glasses to hide his identity then a fucking bat mask is enough to conceal Batman's , also bats are high pitched they use sonar if anything Bale should have been emitting high frequency shrieks if he was going for authenticity ....idiot's everywhere seriously.

3.Matt Damon is Robin

I know exactly what your thinking ....

"What the hell is this idiot talking about , Matt Damon isn't Robin ?."



If you paid attention to the latest trailer we can clearly see a Robin suit defaced by the Joker in spray paint. Clearly in this universe Jason Todd has already been murdered by Joker , and what better thing to have as the the post credit scene in a Batman/Superman flick ? the resurrection of Jason Todd . In the comics Todd was brought back to life originally after Super Boy punched a hole trough reality , This could easily be done in the film by having Superman punch batman straight in the balls , and since Batman has unbreakable gonads the resulting time warp caused by this meeting off fist and testes could be explained as to how the second Robin was revived and who better to play this Robin , none other than Afflecks best friend Matt Damon . The chemistry between the two would be immediate and with his stint in the Bourne movies , Damon would make an awesome Red hood ...Batman Under the Red Hood as this universes first standalone Bat flick thinks so.

4. Zack Snyder is directing

With classics like Sucker Punch and 300 under his belt , Snyder has shown he has the credentials to make [Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice](tag:711870) an iconic masterpiece that will forever don the annals of popular culture. Batman vs Superman will not be his first superhero project, nor is it even his first DC project, having already directed Watchmen and truly capturing the lighthearted tone of the source material even as far to have gained praise from the creator Alan Moore who is notorious for having the up most disdain for adaptions of his work . Moore had the following to say about Snyder's adaption :

"This shit be good nigga " - Alan Moore

Cant argue with that . Also Christopher Nolan ..what has that guy directed besides some silly movie about dream catchers or some nonsense pfffft what a lamo.

5. A tonne of other characters are crammed in too

Wonder Woman , why not ? Lex Luthor a skinny dweeb with long hair ? Ofcourse! With DC trying desperately to catch up with Marvels money spinning cinematic universe , the decision to cram as many characters into one movies as possible is a welcome one , it's not like the inclusion of too many pivotal figures will result in the movie becoming over saturated resulting in none of them been fleshed out properly , not a chance and hey .... they might even have time to squeeze in that hunk from Game of Thrones as Aqua Man , here's hoping !!!!

These have been my 5 reasons why Batman vs Superman will kick The Dark Knight Trilogies ass , thanks for reading !


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