Bywil_stryder, writer at
"It ain't the years, it's the mileage."- Indiana Jones

Okay, true believers, "sucks" is a strong word, but after waiting so long for the second Avengers film, I found it lacking on quite a few levels. Let's discuss the way this box office smash failed!

Reason 1: Tony Stark!

Since 2008, the billionaire, philanthropist, Playboy has been saving the world and himself from bad guys! You could say, he feels that he must atone for a past of creating weapons that were used against the US and its allies. So, why would they make Tony the bad guy in this film?!

While the good guys are having a party, Stark and Banner have set in motion the creation of a "global protector!" Yet, if Tony thought this was a great idea, why would he keep it a secret? In fact, the party almost seems like a distraction to keep our heroes busy, while this new intelligence is completed. Sure, Bruce and Tony thought they had failed, but one should never under estimate Artificial Intelligence.

Reason 2: The Hulk!

After Marvel and Universal's refusal to make a Solo Hulk Sequel, one would assume that the Hulk's part in Avengers 2 would be epic! Especially after his surprisingly good scenes in the first film. Instead, we are given a watered-down Hulk portrayal, where he comes across as an ape who doesn't even speak! After his awesome short line in the first Avengers, I would have expected him to say a few lines in this film. He may speak in short sentences, but those who read his comics know that he does speak a lot! Joss couldn't give us a "Hulk smash?" or a "Hulk the strongest!"

Reason 3: The long awaited Hulk Buster!

Okay, true believers, this is a bit of nit-picking on my part, but it is noteworthy to point out, why did they not call the suit, "Hulk Buster?!" The name sounds cool and it is built for this purpose, so why is Marvel ashamed of the name? Did they really have to give the suit a name like, "Veronica?!" It is cute that Joss said it was named for the opposite of Betty, you know, from the Archie Comics, but it's still annoying. Also, a missed opportunity for Hulk to call Tony something like, "Shell head," but I digress.

Reason 4: Hulk and Widow, a true throwmance!

Did anyone else not buy this romance that was thrust upon us, out of the blue?! Not only did I find it out of place, I found it a little puke-worthy. I believe they threw this in to give Banner more of a story and so they could give some type of romance for the film. I did like that Natasha helped Bruce change from the Hulk, that was cool, her romance is totally out of place with Banner, even though Cap's lines about them during the party make it a little better. However, I would have preferred for Natasha to remain linked to Steve Rogers after their time in Captain America: The Winter Soldier! I would have even liked for her to be involved with Hawkeye, since we all thought that from the first Avengers. In any event, this was one of the film's biggest mistakes!

Reason 5: Out of left field!

So... Hawkeye and Black Widow aren't an item because he has a wife and kids hidden away on the set of the Waltons?! Or some farm house old show. It was kind of cool, since he is a secret agent man and they have "secrets," but this?! Now that we fans have read certain plot points that will be in Next summer's Captain America: Civil War, we know that Hawkeye may be attacked at home, killing his wife and possibly his kids too! At this point, I'm thinking that Marvel and Disney put Joss Whedon in a corner with certain plot musts and he had to just complete his contract and do as they ordered! There is so much about this film that does not feel very "Whedonesque."

Reason 6: Bloody mind control!

So, Joss wanted to add some Avengers with powers other than "Punching" powers, but did he really need to make her mind control the Avengers?! Didn't this totally screw up Hawkeye in the first Avengers? They did spare him this time and he said a cute remark about it, but it was very annoying. It actually seemed like a gimmick so Hulk could have a reason to rampage! (Since when does Hulk need a reason?) It can be argued that her mind control is the reason that Tony obsessively creates the main bad guy, but she only shows him his greatest fear.

Reason 7: Born to die!

After Bryan Singer's phenomenal Quicksilver in Days of Future Past, everyone figured Joss had a good reason for bringing his own Quicksilver to the fold. That reason, it turns out, was so the film could have a good guy die!

"You didn't see that coming," Quicksilver says twice in the film, to Hawkeye, both times! We actually did see this coming, from a mile away! On several occasions, Marvel has missed the opportunities to kill off characters, which would make the danger more realistic for our heroes. In Iron Man 3, I feel that Pepper Potts should have died. It would have given Tony a tragedy to live with and would actually make his recent choices more believable in my opinion! In The Winter Soldier, I feel that Nick Fury should have died! I like Sam L and this one would've hurt, but his career is just fine without the MCU and face it, true believers, Nick Fury is not needed in Age of Ultron. He doesn't offer anything more than Maria Hill could've provided. So, this Quicksilver was simply added to be a quick, simple death, instead of killing someone that would hurt. I guess Civil War will provide a serious death.

Reason 8: Cap and Shell head, blowing their loads!

We all know that our heroes will come to blows next summer, so why let them do it now! I enjoyed their little argument while cutting firewood, but are the good guys so unevolved that they have to fight it out like a couple of meat heads?! It seems foolish for our heroes to act this way. At least hold the battle for one film and that film is Civil War!

Reason 9: The Bad Guy!

After the creepy and exciting trailers, I thought Ultron would be a truly frightening villain. Wrong! This Ultron ended up making more quips than Loki in all of his MCU appearances. It isn't a horrible thing, except again, we have no reason to take the threats seriously when the bad guys come across as more giddy than gruesome! I blame Disney for the cutesy turn of the MCU villains! In 2008, Obadiah Stain is still more frightening than any latter baddie and that is a shame. At this point, Thanos will probably invite the Avengers to an intergalactic dinner and try to defeat them with his stories of growing up in the cosmos!

Reason 10: Why more is not more!

Why do super hero films never learn! In Tim Burton's Batman Returns, The Penguin and Catwoman were too much. In Batman Forever and Batman and Robin, they had too many villains. Even in Amazing Spider-man 2 Electro and a so-called Rhino were not needed and helped to screw up the film! Now, in 2015, Marvel and Disney still make the same mistakes. Too many characters take away from a good story and decent screen time! Now, in a film like The Avengers, there will be five plus characters and they should all be integral parts of the story, but adding new cast to be killed off or some lame plot point (The Maximoffs were trapped by a Stark missile?) is foolish and doesn't make you want to rewatch the film very much! The only new Avenger should have been Vision and I did find him enjoyable. If Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver wouldn't have been added think of all the story Vision and even Ultron could have been given. Maybe Hulk would have had a better story arc.

Reason 11: We been set up here, boys!

As you watch Ultron cut of Klaw's arm and you hear that they're going after Vibranium, it becomes apparent, that Age of Ultron is a set up for Civil War! Even Cap and Stark coming to blows seems to be a reveal of what's to come. Remember what I said about Hawkeye! I just hope they do a much better job on Phase 3 than they did on Phase 2! Since the Russo Bros Directed the best phase 2 film, I have hope that they'll make another brilliant film!

Reason 12: Burnin' out, baby!

This weekend, Ant-man has made about $58 Mil and that's really good, given that it's a "smaller" film. heh-heh. But does it reveal a downward spiral for we fan boys n' girls. Are we suffering from "Marvelitis?" Too many Marvel films and tv Series could be draining us of the excitement for future films and projects. I am concerned that next summer's Box Office battle between Batman v Superman and Civil War may spell bad news for Marvel, since it'll be a DC first to have the three DC heroes on screen together, yet we've seen it a couple of times from Marvel. Hopefully, I'm wrong. I know, I'll be in line on opening day, supporting the next Marvel blockbuster, but I hope they take some pointers from past mistakes!

What do you Marvel fans think?

Whether you agree with me or not, I'm sure we are all glad we live in a time where the MCU is possible and for every mistake, they get a lot more right!


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