I'm not here to tell Universal what to do with its absurdly profitable Fifty Shades of Grey property. It's already made more money than I could ever see in ten lifetimes, and I'm pretty sure the arbiters of such a franchise aren't interested in listening to some guy with delusions of improving what already clearly works. Well that's fine. Maybe I can't help Fifty Shades make any more money, but I'm pretty sure there are some key ways for Fifty Shades Darker to be better received. Here are a few pointers for the sequel to one of this year's biggest movies, like it even needs them!
Follow the Grey story line
While simply redoing an established story isn't exactly groundbreaking, retreading the territory of her first book from Christian Grey's perspective was still about the most inventive thing EL James has ever done. It makes Christian Grey seem like less of a creepy idealistic figure, and more of a... what's it called? Person!
Even better would be to weave Christian's and Ana's perspectives together in the next movie. It would simply make the story seem more like an organic relationship, and would give Jamie Dornan a chance to actually embody a well-rounded person rather than someone there simply to be reacted to. Talking of organic relationships...
Longer sex scenes
Real life sex is not scored by Beyonce. I'm sorry; there just isn't that sense of glamour and finesse that movies like Fifty Shades of Grey seem to paint it with, and that's a good thing. People bring themselves, with all their awkward idiosyncrasies to sexual encounters, and that's what makes it a very personal experience. While the BDSM scenes in Fifty Shades of Grey were lovingly, if sparingly shot, there was very little communication going on between the characters. It was all about style and presentation over genuine human interaction.
Gliders ALL THE TIME!
This might sound silly, but I actually think Fifty Shades Darker needs to have way more scenes that are like that with the glider in Fifty Shades of Grey. The scene was clearly Sam Taylor Johnson panicking and trying to fill the movie with some substance, but it actually turned out to be one of my favorite moments in the movie. Why? Because it was an example of people actually enjoying their time together. Yes, I know the entire concept of Fifty Shades entails a fantasy where every interaction in a relationship is sombre and meaningful. My point is that the dour, poetic moments mean nothing if we don't have the frivolous fun ones to punctuate them.
Make Jack Hyde nice
I've already discussed this possibility in another article, and I'm sure the idea of changing the character of Jack Hyde sounds blasphemous to some fans. However, I genuinely believe it would make the characters of Ana and Christian more interesting. Making Jack Hyde good looking, charming and friendly would actually pose a legitimate dilemma to Anastasia. Suddenly, her staying with Christian would be an informed choice that she made herself, rather than the most logical thing to do. This dynamic would also give Jamie Dornan the task of making his character work to appeal to Ana as a compelling and nice person. This very simple switch would force more dynamic performances from everyone!
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