ByShad Allen Scott, writer at Creators.co
I've watched tons of horror movies, it's my favorite genre, so a horror blog just seems to make sense
Shad Allen Scott

JASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY…argh. That’s twice now that they’ve got that wrong as this is NOT the last FRIDAY THE 13th movie. Welcome to the worst film of the FRIDAY THE 13th series, even worse than FRIDAY THE 13th PART V: A NEW BEGINNING, and that film was terrible.

The movie starts out with a lone woman visiting an upscale cabin in Crystal Lake, and what is the first thing she does after replacing a light bulb? She takes a shower. I’d like to say that this is an excuse to show breasts, but nope, not even side-boob. She hears a disturbing noise, comes face to face with Jason, and clad only in a towel she runs outside to a pre-determined spot where a SWAT team pumps about a thousand rounds into Jason, finally blowing him up into several pieces. That should take care of Jason, right? Nope, turns out the body isn’t the part you have to worry about, its Jason’s black, evil, heart. So throughout the film he jumps from body to body, looking for one that’s just right. Well…there’s more to that last part, but I want to talk about that later in the review. Oh, and we have our second bounty hunter of the series, played by X-FILES’ Steven Williams. He doesn’t do a whole lot though and spends most of the film locked up behind bars. Well…he gives us valuable information, making him a lazy character that’s just around to create a shortcut to understanding the plot.

Have you ever thought to yourself “Gee…I sure wish Jason had a sister”? Well you’re in luck, because he did…apparently. Yup…nine films and suddenly from out of nowhere he had a sister, a niece, and his niece has her own child. What does it all mean? Well, luckily we have Duke the bounty hunter to explain it in ninety seconds (which I guess is good because otherwise the movie would be longer, and no one wants that). Apparently the only way Jason can be ‘reborn’ is if he body jumps into a Vorhees. Also, the only way he can be truly killed is by a Vorhees. And since I don’t see her baby wielding a knife against Jason, and her mother dies earlier on in the film, means the job goes to Jason’s niece.

Of course, she refuses to believe that such a thing is true and that that is her destiny. Every time she denies it you just want to punch her in the face and scream “THE SOONER YOU ACCEPT THIS, THE SOONER THE MOVIE WILL BE OVER”!!! Good thing she has her child’s father to help her accept the truth, even though it takes him several attempts until she believes him and stops trying to kill him (she thinks he killed her mother…long story) long enough to bring upon the final boss battle. Jason dies, gives a disappointing fireworks show, and is dragged down to hell by demon hands. Except for his mask. His mask gets special treatment. After everything is said and done the hand of Freddy Krueger bursts from the ground, grabs the mask, and drags it underground (also, Freddy laughs, but it’s painfully obvious that it isn’t Robert Englund’s laugh). This was because finally both A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and FRIDAY THE 13th were owned by the same studio (New Line Cinema) and they wanted to tease a FREDDY VS JASON movie. Little did they know that it would take ten years of development hell until FREDDY VS JASON finally came out into theaters.

This film is an attempt at evolution of the franchise. They wanted to change things up and make the film different from everything that came before. Remember the last time they tried this? That’s right, FRIDAY THE 13th PART V: A NEW BEGINNING, and that film was pure trash. As much as we cry out for newness, for change, for bold new visions, in the end we pretty much just want the same thing we were force fed before. This doesn’t sound very progressive but it is FRIDAY THE 13th, it’s a little slasher series that does one thing, and does it well, and it’s never going to re-invent the wheel. Sometimes if it isn’t broke, why fix it? I guess what I’m trying to say is that the FRIDAY THE 13th doesn’t need to aspire to be anything better than it is. It’s your standard slasher, and unless you’re Wes Craven or Rob Zombie, you should keep doing what you’re doing.

It’s not exactly that I’m against the idea of changing it up, but it was just done so poorly in FRIDAY THE 13TH PART V: A NEW BEGINNING, and it’s even worse here in JASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY.

Also, can anyone tell me why the Necronomicon from the EVIL DEAD series is a featured prop in this movie? I remember that there was a brief cry out for FREDDY VS JASON VS ASH, but I can’t imagine that was an attempt to set up that film that never happened.

Anyway, really dislike this film…obviously. So let’s move on to my favorite, and don’t worry…I can justify it.

Trending

Latest from our Creators