ByJake Cook, writer at
I love movies and superheroes and sometimes I make funny videos about them
Jake Cook

Let us take a moment to look back at the MCU's humble beginnings, with this brief recap of all their phase one films, presented in this 5 minute limerick. Enjoy!

Of cause, if you don't want to watch the above video (and why wouldn't you?) there is a written copy of the limerick below. The downside is, it doesn't come with all the funny site gags and pictures, to see those you'd better watch the video... But hey, who am I to tell you how to live your life?

The MCU Phase 1 Limerick:

There once was a man called Tony

Who was a major show pony

Then he got captured

Leaving him fractured

But he’ll prove he’s no phoney

Because it’s this abduction

That will lead construction

Of a new suit of armour

Turning him from charmer

To a weapon of mass destruction

When he arrived back in his homeland

He cancelled his weapons program

Jeff Bridges wasn’t happy

Instead he felt quite crappy

For things hadn’t gone as he’d planned

Jeff wanted to steal Stark’s business

That’s why he hired the terrorists

But they failed their task

Didn’t do what was asked

So Jeff killed them for stupidness

Stark had a new suit to test

So the armour could be its best

He could take flight

And win any fight

Thanks to the device in his chest

But it was stolen by the bad guy

Who left Stark alone to die

But he was unaware

That Tony had a spare

So he’ll give it another try

Jeff built a suit with the stolen tech

To help him break Stark’s neck

But with help from a friend

Tony got his happy end

And left poor Jeff in quite a wreck

So ends Iron Man’s first Adventure

He’d managed to thwart every danger

He saved the day

in his special way

Now Furry want’s him to be an Avenger

Meanwhile, somewhere in Brazil

Meditating up on a hill

Lived Bruce Banner

controlling his manner

Because he’s incredibly ill

He was infected by gamma rays

So now he spends his days

trying to find a cure

so he may ensure

The end of his Hulking ways

He also worked at a soda factory

Before being found by the military

They attacked him

But Hulk beat them

Due to in inaffective artillery

So they came up with a new plan

To make their own Hulk hit man

They put a super drug

Into a military thug

Turning him into a superman

Bruce went to his ex for assistance

They soon met with military resistance

Enter the super guy!

Who Hulk leaves to die

But at least he has persistence?

Bruce and Betty find Mr. Blue

A scientist who says he has a clue

About how to deduce

A cure for Bruce

But he has an agenda too

He saw great possibility

With The Hulks invincibility

Though it wasn’t ethical

It was purely medical

But Banner felt differently

Then the Military came back again

Super guy made Blue his friend

Banner was arrested

Blonsky got injected

And that brings us to the films end

Blonsky became The Abomination

Went on a rampage across the nation

Military asked Bruce for Help

To beat the the bad guy to a whelp

And Hulk was successful in this action

So Bruce goes back on the Run

Taking us back to where he begun

He learns to control the Hulk

Maybe now he wont be a Sulk

Oh well, at least this movie is done

Lets get back to Tony Stark

Things have gotten a little dark

Because he’s dying you see

Poisoned by his own machine

But he’s still up for a bit of a lark

Though perhaps he takes it too far

When he tries to drive a racing car

To add to those fears

The bad guy appears

And he and Tony have a bit of a spar

The reason why Whiplash is so mad?

The Starks did something to his dad

So he wants payback

So went on the attack

Hoping it’d stop him from feeling sad

But it doesn’t really workout

Then this hammer guy comes about

He asks the big Russian brute

To build him an Iron Man suit

And he agreed with a mighty pout

Meanwhile Tony was starting to get rowdy

Which managed to piss off Rhody

This little tiff

Lead to some biff

And then Tony left acting all pouty

Then along comes Nick Furry

Who’s all like “No need to worry!”

“Rest asure

We have a cure

Now pull your head in Tony!”

So He teams up with War Machine

Just as Whiplash re-enters the scene

Through teamwork he’s bested

And Hammer is arrested

Which wraps it all up nice and clean

Meanwhile in a world a far

Is the Kingdom of Asgard

Home to the Mighty Thor

As well as many more

This is where things get bizarre

Thor wants all frost giants dead

He lets power go to his head

Odin says “That’s it!

I’m sick of your shit!”

Banishes Thor and goes to bed

Earth is where Thor gets stranded

In a small town is where he’s landed

He calls for his hammer

But it won’t answer

Not till his mind is expanded

His brother Loki hatches a plan

To become king of his Homeland

it doesn’t make sense

but in his defence

It does work for a short span

To stop Thor from ruining his day

He sent a robot to blow him away

But his timing was whack

Cause Thor’s powers were back

And he used them to win the fray

So Thor goes home again

To put Asgard on the mend

He defeats his brother

Saves his father

But can’t be with his girlfriend

Now lets take a trip back in time

Where the worlds days weren't fine

Countries were at war

Enemies at our door

The time for a hero was nigh

So this little guy gets pumped with a drug

That turns him into a big, loveable lug

Gets a chance for adventure

When is best friend is captured

But these aren’t normal german thugs

Steve sneaks into enemy territory

Where he makes a new discovery

Meets the Red Skull

The one in control

Of Hydra’s space aged artillery

So Steve becomes Captain America

I nice bit of war propaganda

He gets a new out fit

A shield to go with it

That he’ll use to crush Hydra’s agenda

But all didn’t go so well

When poor, old Bucky fell

Right off a train

to a world of pain

Twas quite a sad farewell

No time to morn for his loss

Cap has to take on the boss

When they infiltrate the lair

Bad guys take to the air

But America win’s at any cost

Cap gets aboard the vessel

He and Red have a wrestle

Cap wins the row

No time for how

He has to stop the missile

The only way to prevent a slaughter

Was to crash the plane into the water

So Cap got frozen

But thanks to erosion

He was discovered in the future

Which brings us back the present

And to the start of a new event

Loki is now on Earth

Ready to prove his worth

Through malicious and evil intent

Fury calls in Cap now that he’s awake

Bringing in Stark was a piece of cake

Then they got The Hulk

Whose no longer a sulk

And somehow Thor will also partake

But all they do is fight each other

They don’t seem to like one another

They do get their man

But it was part of his plan

Which they’d of stopped if they worked together

He uses a brainwashed hawk eye

To blow their base out of the sky

Banner goes into a rage

Hulk goes on a rampage

Oh and Loki murders a guy

Black widow deprograms Barton

While the others learn their lesson

They figure what Loki’s up to

Now it’s time to bid him adieu

Along with his alien invasion

While the Avengers battle the army

And Hulk beats the shit out of Loki

The government convenes

And then it decrees

That they must send a nuke to the city

But this turns out to be a benefit

As Iron Man is able to redirect it

He sends it through the portal

To the Alines strong hold

And then they all die thanks to this hit

So now that they’ve saved the day

The Avengers go their separate way

Meanwhile up in space

A guy with a purple face

Wonders how things went so astray

Thanks for taking the time to read this. If you liked it please share it around with anyone else who think would also enjoy it. If you didn't please leave a comment telling me why. Stay tuned for more videos and articles.


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