ByMarcus A. Stricklin, writer at

I would like to apologize to Iron Man aka Tony Stark aka Robert Downey Jr. It's nothing personal, but I've chosen a side, and it's not yours.

I was there for you in the beginning when you were locked up in a cave and somehow were determined to escape against all odds. I cheered for you when you took down Obadiah Stane. I was there for you when you were being poisoned by your own arc reactor.

I was there for you during that Iron Man 2 movie. You know, the worst of the bunch. The Avengers (the best of the Marvel movies). Iron Man 3 (I can't lie, it's my favorite of the trilogy). Avengers Age of Ultron.

That second tier love affair that I had, ended. Like as soon as it was announced that you would be in Captain America 3. The very second I read that it was Civil War, because I know the storyline and (scowls) I know what you do.

You see, I have this first tier love affair with Captain America. Okay who am I kidding, Chris Evans. To me Cap is everything that a guy should be. Yes he comes off as wholesome and goody goody. Yes he says "golly." Even when he was puny and had the head the size of a watermelon on the body of a prepubescent teen, he was still standing up to the big bad bully. He believed in doing the right thing. He will never back down from what he believes is right, regardless of what he has to do. He is willing to die for the cause. He even stood up to his best friend with the metal arm, so what do you think he will do to you? A guy he has had issues with in the past.

Yes, you nearly sacrificed yourself in the Battle of New York by flying that nuke into the giant wormhole, because that's what true superheroes do. Cap brought down Hydra, aka, the people who murdered your parents. What upppppppp.

Here's the point though. You're going against Captain America. Dude has America in his name. How can any self respecting patriot root against Cap? It's like rooting for Hydra to succeed even when you know they are going to do the absolute worst to humanity. I don't know what this version of Civil War will bring, but I do know that the two most recognizable Avengers are leading two separate teams against each other. I know there is a conflict. I know that friendships will be severed. We will FINALLY get Spider-Man where he belongs. Black Panther makes an appearance. Black Widow will kick some ass. That's all I know.

I am insanely eager to see how it plays out, because I am a huge fan of Captain America, and despite everything, I want him to kick your metal ass.

With respect to Iron Man, I've chosen my side.

I'm team Captain America, bitch.


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