Boy. What a f*cked franchise. How can it be fixed? What can Marvel do to rise this fried phoenix from the ashes of 20th Century Fox? It's simple.
YOU HAVE TO RESPECT THE SOURCE MATERIAL.
The Fantastic Four is Marvel's first family, and should be treated as such. Let me reiterate that... Family. Not group of awkward twenty-somethings. They need to love each other. Joke with each other. Be a friggin' family.
So how could we do this? How could we incorporate it into Marvel's cinematic universe. First thing's first, we gotta throw them into 2017's Spider-Man starring Tom Holland. This is their firs appearance. They find an unconscious Spider-Man somewhere in New York, and take him back to the Baxter Building for research.
They introduce themselves as a super-powered team of scientific researchers: THE FANTASTIC FOUR. Truth is, these guys were around long before the Avengers, but never got their recognition because they were never public superheroes. So who are they?
Before we go any further, we need to establish this film as a comedy, much like Guardians of the Galaxy or Ant-Man. It is the only way to redeem the family's name.
The lovably awkward Reed Richards, the love of Susan Storm, the smartest man on Earth. Who could play him? Obviously not Miles Teller. Who the hell is Ioan Grufford? (Oh, right. Forever). No, we need a fresh face.... or a familiar one?
Andrew Garfield. Oh ha ha. Wait, this might be good casting actually. I can see it now. Emma Stone as Invisible Woman. Dane DeHaan as Human Tor--eh, no. No. As much as Garfield deserves a role in the MCU, we need a background in comedy.
Bill Hader for Reed Richards? Okay... Okay, sure. Bill Hader.
Oh shit, what's going on? Kristen Wiig as Invisible Woman? This is amazing.
What's this? A fit, Marvel-trained Jonah Hill as the cocky Human Torch? Bring it.
Wait, who's gonna play the Thi--
OH MY GOD. DANNY MCBRIDE. KENNY F*CKING POWERS AS THE THING.
So, once this is successful, who will play Dr. Doom in the destined-to-be-successful FANTASTIC FOUR movie from Marvel Studios?
I don't know. Joaquin Phoenix? Jake Gyllenhaal? Someone who can play a dictator science wizard, not some lame CEO or bitchy computer hacker whose eyes are oddly close together.
There you go, Marvel. Money. Go away, Fox-- ya bother me.