Disney villains are generally a pretty tough group to defend. However generally unspeakable their actions may be, some people out there choose to believe the best of human (and non-human) kind and can somehow reason a defense for their cases.
Recently a Reddit thread, started by ineed_one_more_lette, asked the question:
Defense lawyers of Reddit, what would your defense be for various Disney villains?
While it might be counterintuitive to defend someone we all know as a villain, these Redditors gave it their very best! Check out their defenses below:
1. Ursula, The Little Mermaid
Ursula made a contract with Ariel that had no clause saying that Ursula was not allowed to interfere. The contract stated that she had to get Eric to fall in love with her without her voice, she failed, and she has to pay the price for her failure. It's not Ursula's fault Ariel doesn't put things by a lawyer before she signs them.
Edit: My highest rated comment (and third highest rated anything) is an argument that, as many of you have pointed out, wouldn't stand up in an actual court due to Ariel being underage and not being able to make her own decisions
But Ariel was a minor, so she didn't have legal standing to enter into a contract
Do we know the age in which one becomes an adult in the Atlantican legal system though? Here she may have been legally old enough but her father just treated her like a child because he is overprotective.
Who am I to dispute a contract? If anything this whole debacle taught Ariel to always read the fine print, which might come in handy for a princess.
2. Captain Hook, Peter Pan
My client Captain Hook suffers from severe PTSD after being brutally mauled by a crocodile.
Peter Pan's ceaseless taunting aggravated his condition and caused a mental break.
You must find him not guilty by reason of temporary insanity.
Temporary insanity? Let's not forget it's through the childish and vengeful actions of Peter Pan that Captain Hook lost his hand in the first place!
3. Claude Frollo, The Hunchback of Notre Dame
It's not his fault that in God's plan he made the Devil so much stronger than a man.
Heck, he has a whole song about it.
4. Gaston, Beauty and the Beast
Gaston. He was a hunter by nature and there was a deadly beast in his village. He rightfully took a militia and attempted to seize the beast. Girl taken hostage, father taken hostage previous to her, the beats servants and maids were all essentially hostages. I mean I still feel for Gaston. If Belle didn't have that weird fetish this would make an awesome rescue story!
Gaston would've called instead of showing up late at night with torches and pitchforks but he didn't know the phone number of the beast.
Although Gaston might have been a misogynist and a pretty bad guy in general, there's little evidence to suggest he's a true villain. The members of his mob simply wanted to free Belle from her captor! Besides, I'm sure that a ton of the townspeople would be willing to stand in as character witnesses.
5. Jafar, Aladdin
He was performing his duty as royal vizier to investigate the credentials of the new heir apparent, who was essentially a conman committing fraud against the royal family.
Yeah, but I think kidnapping a genie, and enslaving the royal family to take over the palace goes a bit over the limits of his job. If anything, Aladdin was just lying to a girl to get some p*ssy. Becoming the sultan was a side effect that even he didn't want.
Kidnapping a genie? You mean securing an extemely powerful and dangerous magical artifact that was in the hands of a known thief who was trying to swindle his way into royalty. Jafar was merely doing his duty as Vizier when he took the lamp from that hoodlum - the genie could potentially be as powerful as a nuke ; of course Jafar had to step in and take it for the government.
If anything, Jafar was being a responsible government worker! He was the only one who could truly see through Aladdin's disguise. Let's chalk this one up to Jafar just going above and beyond the call of royal vizier.
6. Shere Khan, The Jungle Book
While the violent intruder, who goes by the savage name "Mowgli", endangered the security and peace of the entire jungle, as he brought a weapon of mass destruction, that by experts is known as "fire", into the sovereign territory of the jungle, my client, the noble and acknowledged Mister Shere Khan, was one of the few citizens to realize the potential threat caused by this unlawful human creature.
Selflessly he fought the creature, while others were too lazy or driven by foolish and egoistic attempts to attain power through the human.
My client should therefore be treated as a hero and the true villains should be punished according to the laws of the jungle. Meaning Mister Shere Khan should be granted the right to kill and eat them.
Shere Khan is the king of this jungle, and as the benevolent ruler he is, he was simply attempting to help protect those living in the jungle. Fire, especially if made by a mere child, could easily destroy their jungle habitat.
7. Hans, Frozen
Prince Hans' attempted assassination of Queen Elsa was carried out on behalf of the nation of Arendelle, which would almost certainly have suffered tremendous loss of life and a devastating economic downturn had the winter gone on any longer.
So, the next step is to discredit Anna. She'll say "he said this," and he'll say, "No I didn't," so it becomes a question of credibility. Perhaps she could be painted as a spurned lover seeking revenge? Locked up in a castle with no friends or family since childhood has left her emotionally unstable; it's no wonder she fixated upon literally the first handsome man she met. He broke it off with her when he discovered this instability, and she didn't take it well, so she accuses him of attempting to murder her sister for personal reasons, rather than his true, more noble purpose of killing her to save Arendelle.
God, I felt a little dirty writing that.
In the argument for credibility, I'd say that not being locked up in a castle his whole life would definitely help Hans. He has an entire royal family who would (hopefully) be willing to testify on his behalf.
8. Scar, The Lion King
What crime are we talking about here? Mufasa was killed by a stampeding herd of wildebeest. It was a tragedy, and our leader Scar mourned his brother's death before putting his personal pain aside to lead a nation that needed him.
And now his nephew, who mysteriously ran off after his father's death, shows up and accuses him of foul play years later? A kid who has spent his life up until this point shirking all responsibility, living with a couple of deviants, and doing God knows what. This runaway, who has never held down a job mind you, suddenly can't get his fix so he comes home and starts making demands. When his loving uncle, Scar, refuses to just hand over everything and suggests that Simba enter a rehabilitation program all of a sudden he starts throwing around wild accusations.
This case has no merit.
This is what I would go with. Did anyone see Scar push Mufasa to his death? Did the post-mortem show any evidence that Mufasa may have been fighting with Scar or any other lion before his death? No and no (presumably...). So how can anyone say beyond reasonable doubt, that Scar was responsible for the death of the fallen leader, Mufasa.
Not even Simba, who was present at the scene of the crime, saw Scar push Mufasa! From thereon out it's all hearsay and speculation, your honor!
9. Man, Bambi
The guy who killed Bambi's mother didn't commit a crime. He was providing for his family by putting venison on the table.
It was one of the most brutal Disney murders, but as long as he had a hunting license this killer is in the clear. Okay, so most of these might not stand up in court. We can also surmise, since this is the Internet and all, that these responses were likely not crafted by actual defense lawyers. Still, they all make pretty interesting cases! I would happily watch an episode ofJudge Judy
featuring Disney villains anytime.