On the TV show Daria, the titular character and her family moved to Lawndale. As soon as she opened her mouth it was clear Daria Morgendorffer wasn't like other teenagers her age. It seemed that she was out of luck in the friend department until she found a kindred soul in Jane Lane. Throughout the series they shared many intimate conversations, sardonic jabs, and pizza slices. Through thick and thin, Daria and Jane managed to stick it out and maintain their kooky union. Whether they were tested by 'the system' or siren calls from a wealthy, male Jezebel, they've stuck together. Now, with their presumed happily ever after in the series finale, what can we take from their experiences that we can apply to our own BFF relationships?
4. Accept Your BFF's Family
While we can't choose our families, it helps when a friend not only tolerates our eccentric kin, but also embraces them occasionally. Point taken from Jane in 'Gifted' when Quinn (Daria's younger sister) was turned away by all of her friends and needed a place to stay while her family was away. She eventually wound up on Jane's door step and begged to sleepover. Despite Jane not being a personal fan of Daria's narcissistic younger sister, she reluctantly let her in. Although, Quinn's incessant ramblings eventually broke Jane and she escorted the young Morgendorffer home, much to Daria's amusement.
While it was an unpleasant experience for Jane, this instance proved that she'll put up with the Morgendorffers for Daria's sake. Arguments can arise when there's conflict or friction between pals and their friend's family, and knowing that your BFF is on good terms with them makes things a whole lot easier.
3. There's No "I" in "Team"
It takes two, compadre, all for one and one for...Okay, you get the gist of it. It's important to be there for our BFFs, and help out when they need it. Such as in 'Pinch Sitter' when Daria's babysitting two kids and Jane came to her rescue and (along with bringing junk food) uses her aunt know-how to assist in putting the children to bed. Daria later returned the favor when she helped Jane get out of a traffic violation in 'Speedtrapped.'
2. Confrontation Is Inevitable and Necessary
Nobody likes it. No matter how big or small it is, we can't escape it. Daria and Jane had to confront one another in a few tough scenarios that could've dissolved their friendship entirely. In 'Misery Chick,' after the two joked about a former, jerky high school quarterback named Tommy Sherman prematurely dying, he ironically kicks the bucket and Jane purposely stays clear of Daria's tracks. Later, Daria catches Jane at home and they have a heart to heart about her mixed reaction to his death and Daria's new, undesired status 'misery chick' (a title implying that she's miserable 24/7). Jane revealed that she'd been avoiding Daria because she felt guilty about what they'd said about Tommy. She didn't want to think that their comments caused his passing.
Next in 'Dye! Dye My Darling,' Jane and Daria's relationship became tense after Tom (Jane's boyfriend) came into the picture. Suddenly, Trent and Jane were suspecting that Daria was into Tom, which she protested throughout the whole episode, until she and Tom were alone and talking, and they kissed. She was immediately remorseful, and the next day she hesitantly told Jane what'd happened. Even though this almost ruined their friendship, it would've been immensely worse if Jane had heard it from somebody else.
1. Communication Is Key
Cliched as it sounds, communication is integral in keeping relationships fortified. For those who are similar to Daria in that they're emotionally conservative, it's critical that we're as open and frank with our BFFs as possible. They're sometimes (usually) the only ones we can turn to. In 'Boxing Daria,' Daria saw a discarded refrigerator box in her yard and she immediately became transfixed by it. Later, she crawled inside and remembered how a similar box served as a safe haven for her during a difficult period in her childhood. This incident being Jake and Helen constantly fighting due to her "anti-social" behavior in school.
When Daria's family noticed this, they managed to coax her out of the box and tried to explain their past frustration, but she felt even more guilty and drove off to meet Tom (her boyfriend) at the Cove. However, a road collision (she averted the accident) cancels the trip. Jane later met her at a roadstop diner and they talked about her repentance towards her parents' bickering about her, and her cynical behavior in the past years, which she considered warranted. Jane consoled her to a degree, but suggested she ultimately talk to her parents about this. Daria knew, but said she wanted to speak to the person she trusted most first.
Despite Jane and Daria being fictional, they had a completely authentic friendship. They're kindred spirits, and in tune to each other in a way that they immediately recognize when something's wrong. Despite coming across rough patches on their journey, they've learned from their mistakes, and continued forward with their relationship being stronger than ever. Just from their experiences alone, we've witnessed a beautiful friendship maturing into a union that could possibly last a lifetime. Hopefully we can all learn something from Daria and Jane, and maybe our BFF relationships can just as poignant and deep with these four important lessons.